Until She Was Gone

Chapter 12 | first kiss

I soon forgot about that hand that had grabbed me. The line to the ferris wheel was shorter than we thought. As the lights flickered different colors, we both climbed in.

Austin sat closer to me than we had ever before. His arm brushed mine. When the wheel started spinning, I felt fresh air hit my face. My hair broke loose and started flying. As if involuntarily, Austin's hand brushed a stray strand of my face. As I breathed the air in, I realized how much I had needed this. Someone beside me. Someone with me. Somewhere to be.

The ocean shone beneath us, and The Pier sparkled even more when looked at from above. I looked at Austin,

" This is beautiful, Thank you." I said, I was genuine. This felt like a breath of fresh air. For once, Austin looked at me happily, but in a serious way.

' You're the one I should be thanking.'' he said, " You agreed on a date, even if you knew my reputation.'' he added a bit guiltily. I let out a small breathy laugh.

" You're reputation doesn't scare me. I don't care how many girls you have slept with. All I know is that you're a good person and I wanted to spend time with you." I said, He let out a nervous chuckle,

" Only spend time with me? Nothing more?"

I thought for some time before replying. If he was going to play, I would play too. I smirked.

" I mean... kissing is fine too..." I said, my voice almost lowering down to a whisper. I saw his eyes spark before he lowered his nose down to mine. Our foreheads touched.

"Is it fine?" he asked, also breathily. Little did he know, it would be my first kiss. I wasn't going to show him that though.

"Yes." I said and brought my mouth closer to his. As the wheel spun down, our lips touched.

Everything that happened after that blurred away to me. Before I knew it, we were on the ride back home. 

My lips still tingled from my first kiss. I never told him it was my first, since he had taken control the moment our lips brushed. I couldn't feel much. I supposed it was because Austin stopped before I could even hold his shoulders. He had grinned down at me. We were at the bottom and had to get out. 

We had reached the car and he had given me a small kiss. We didn't really say much as we traveled back to the college dorms. I avoided looking directly at him. I would bet to a thousand that I was blushing like a tomato. I could feel his eyes behind my head. When we reached the campus, the night had silenced everything around us. Austin got out of the car, and like a true gentleman, opened the car door for me too. As I got out, I collided into his chest. For once, I was aware of how tall he was. His arms came around me as his breath tickled my ear.

" Sylvia Hale, I might just want to do that again" he breathed into my ear. I didn't bother to wonder how he knew my last name without me having to tell him. I guess he had his ways.

" What?" I asked, just as softly. His hand came up to my neck, and my breath hitched,

" A date." he said and kissed my cheek. I saw him wink in the dark before he disappeared from the parking lot. Leaving me there, figuring out what the hell I was feeling.

I wasn't too surprised to see Becca sitting on her bed patiently when I came back. When she saw me enter, she jumped up. Looking at her wristwatch, she said,

" 11:00. You go at 6:30. And come five hours later. How could you stand him for so long?" I shrugged.

" We went to Santa Monica Pier." I said, Her mouth formed to an O.

" Of course he took you there. He takes every girl there." she said. My heart dropped slightly. Her eyes widened,

" No, I mean, like -"

" It's okay Becca. I'm not looking for a serious one anyway, remember?"

" Yeah Yeah. But... I just have this feeling this time is different. With Austin." she said. I looked pointedly at her,

" There is no need for that to make me feel better" I said. She looked back at me pointedly. Her dark brown eyes looked like they were penetrating me. Again.

" No, actually Sylvia. It's the way he looks at you."

" I'm pretty sure he looks at every one of his conquests like that." I responded, rolling my eyes. She narrowed her eyes at me but quit the argument. Sitting back on the bed, she asked,

" So, what did you guys do there?"

" Ehh, nothing. Just eating, riding, and kissing." the last one came out of my mouth involuntarily. Eek. 

Rebecca immediately stood up. Her eyes widened again. She looked like she was going to scream. I nervously sat on my bed awaiting her reaction. She was frozen for a moment before she squealed the loudest squeal ever.

" KISS? He freaking kissed you? Oh my god." she began jumping.

" you have to tell me everything!" I laughed at her excitement. 

So I told her. Everything.

But a small thought kept budging into my head, the fact that I had felt nothing.

 Nothing when Austin Ashford kissed me. Nothing when his lips touched mine. 

No fire, no desire, no chills. Though, maybe it could be that my expectations were too high. Maybe that's how a kiss is anyway. Whether it was with Austin Ashford or anyone else.

Or, I really felt nothing for him.