You don't choose who you fall in love with

Dean

Dean woke up to the sound of someone knocking on his door. He groaned and slowly sat up, rubbing his eyes and yawning. He stretched his arms before resting them at his sides, letting his eyes adjust to the light that was shining through his curtains.

"Who is it?" He asked.

"Just the maid your Highness. Breakfast is ready."

Dean yawned again before standing up and walking towards his wardrobe.

"I'll be right there!" He called, opening his wardrobe and pulling out his outfit for the day.

He got dressed and then made his way to the dining area, and took a seat at the end of a long table. He smiled at his mother and bowed his head slightly at his parents.

"Your birthday is tomorrow. Anything special you would like to do?" John asked after swallowing a bite of his food.

Dean just shrugged and took a bite of his food. "Not really."

"Nothing at all?" Mary asked.

Dean just shook his head and continued eating.

"Are you excited? You might meet your future wife." John said. He was talking about Dean's birthday ball the following night.

"Yeah." Dean said quietly.

The truth was, Dean didn't feel that way about any of the potential women in his life. He didn't feel attracted to any women, in fact. And he didn't know how to tell his parents, so he just kept it to himself. He figured maybe, just maybe, if he found the right girl, these feelings would change. He was almost 21, and he'd been feeling like a disappointment for 6 years now. Even though nobody knew this was how he felt, he had a constant feeling of guilt buried inside him.

He was excited for tomorrow, just not as much he probably should be. He finished the rest of his breakfast in silence, before excusing himself. He had a couple hours before he had to go to his classes for the day, so he just walked around the garden, thinking to himself.

He said hello to the gardener as he passed him, and a few minutes later, Dean found himself sitting on a bench near a couple of rose bushes. He sighed and watched the bees and butterflies, flying around the flowers and he thought how beautiful it was. How something so small, so beautiful, could do what they do. He'd always had a fascination with animals and nature. It reminded him that life isn't all bad. Most of it's quite beautiful and happy.

After a while, his mother came out to let him know that it was time for his classes. He nodded and left to go learn how to be a prince and a king for the millionth time in his life. He didn't mind though, the thought of ruling an entire kingdom was scary, but not the worst thing that Dean has had to deal with. He wouldn't officially become king until he married a princess, or his father died. Otherwise he had to wait until his 23rd birthday. The thought of how his parents might react to how he was feeling, at least his father, made his stomach hurt. But he refused to let his thoughts overwhelm him durning class, so he just did his best to focus on other things.

That evening, after dinner, Mary was talking to Dean while he picked out an outfit for tomorrow. He couldn't choose between two outfits, so he just decided to wait until tomorrow to pick.

"You seemed a bit off today, is something bothering you?" She asked softly.

"I don't know. Maybe a little." Dean sighed, sitting down on the side of his bed.

Mary sat next to him and wrapped her arm around his shoulder.

"What's wrong? Whatever it is, you can tell me."

"Mom I-" he paused. "I guess I'm just.....nevermind. It's nothing." He stood up.

"Are you sure?" Mary asked, standing up as well.

"Yes. I'm actually feeling pretty tired, I think I'm just gonna go to sleep."

"Okay sweetie. Goodnight." Mary walked over to her son and hugged him, kissing his cheek. "I love you son."

"I love you too mom. Goodnight." He watched as she left the room, closing the door on her way out.

He smiled and got ready for bed before sliding under the covers. Although he was tired, it was another 3 hours before he fell asleep. He kept thinking about tomorrow.

'How am I supposed to tell them I like men? Surely they'd hate me. Why can't I just like women like I'm supposed to?' He thought to himself.