Zi Xinyu's Short Stories Translated by: timebun

By The River of Forgetfulness for Seven Lifetimes

Between the two banks of that other shore, the place where all souls return to, was where the cold and dismal Bridge of Helplessness stood.

I was watching spirits pass by in silence. Some of them were accompanied by another spirit, while others were alone. They walked along a path lined with blooming crimson flowers, like a bloody sea, moving step by step towards that evil bridge.

Even if they were unwilling, even if they tried as hard as they could to struggle and retreat, it wouldn't change anything around them.

The sight of those lonely figures slowly drifting towards the side of the Bridge of Helplessness filled me with laments.

Why can't this hell covered in red spider lilies continue all the way up to the horizon?

Kind Old Lady Meng, can I not drink that soup in your hands?

Can I not drink it...?

As conflicted as I was, my turn still came.

"Little miss, drink some soup. Forget everything. Your next life is a new beginning, without any earthly desires or pain."

"But what about that person in my heart?"

I asked, my lips barely moving. I couldn't bear to, I wasn't willing to forget.

He was the most pampered amongst the emperor's sons: the seventh prince. Although he wasn't the crown prince, he was still heaven's favoured child; all their blessings were given unto him. He was extremely handsome, brimming with talent, and envied by all the people of the world.

The most that had ever happened between the two of us was simply how he liked to listen to me play the qin. He kept saying that I was a friend dear to his heart, and when he had nothing to do, he loved to share his inner thoughts with me.

Occasionally, he would also lament to me that he was just a prince. No matter how favoured he was, he wasn't the crown prince.

I would also give voice to my own laments. Even though I was a famed courtesan in the capital, no matter how famous I was, I was still a prostitute.

I would be happy with him even if I could only be his concubine.

However, he spent his whole life chasing after fame.

Chasing after status.

The crown prince was a threat to his position, but as a woman, I didn't have the power to help him in any aspect.

So I tried to find a way to marry the crown prince, hoping that the seventh prince would understand what I was trying to do. I would help him, and I would finally be much more than a useless prostitute.

I would help him rise up to the throne. For his sake, using that crown prince would be nothing.

Thus, when the emperor died, he succeeded the imperial throne.

As for that crown prince...

We ended up with the same fate.

I wasn't resigned to my end. My love, I still owed him an explanation!

He was the one I loved, he was the one I was supporting, and I had even died for him. Now that he had finally become the emperor, I didn't even get the chance to ask him if he had loved me.