DWEO : Zhanyi MPREG

18. Breathing

Yibo POV

I looked at the man in the mirror of the bathroom; his face was tear-stained and pale. His eyes seemed an endless pool of pain and his expression was blank. I remembered the same man 2 years ago, the only difference is that this one had no hope, had nothing to fight for.

That was it, my heart was finished; there was nothing left of it because there was a hollow and numb feeling in my chest...in my whole body.

Somehow I knew this was going to happen, I knew that at some point I was going to have to wake up from this dream I've been living in. I just only wished that when that time came, I wouldn't evaporate along with my dream.

For some reason the phrase God giveth and God taketh away came to me. I was given Zhan, someone who I thought I didn't deserve. So why did it kill me to let go of him when he never belonged to me in the first place.

I knew I would always be this man in the mirror, and this time there was no starting over, no running away to a faraway place. Because that was it for me, my life began and ended with the man I left downstairs last night.

I covered my mouth feeling nauseated, I ran to the toilet and opened my mouth but nothing came out. I wiped a tear that escaped the corner of my eye, surprised that I still had any tears left at all.

I got out to get dressed, not really caring what I wore.

I went downstairs to find Fufu and Zhan having coffee in still silence. Zhan looked dressed for work, I was glad that he would be leaving soon; I didn't want to stay cooped up in my room all day. He looked as handsome as ever, it pierced me down to my soul; though today he looked tired and pale. He looked up at me, there was an unfathomable emotion in his eyes; I recognized it from the man in the mirror, pain? I must be wrong.

I don't know what my own face or eyes revealed because I thought I saw him flinch as he looked away. "Good morning" I said my voice blank and lifeless

"Good morning Yibo, breakfast is ready. Where would you like to have it?" Fufu asked, her voice worried.

"In the penthouse please" I replied monotonously

"Alright, I'll bring it to you" she said, I turned to face Zhan; who was watching me intently. 

"I saw my iPod and a couple of my things on my nightstand, thank you" I said, my voice had no trace of emotion. He slowly nodded and I walked outside towards the penthouse, it sounded like Fufu and Zhan argued after I left; but I really didn't care either way.

I sat in the patio of the penthouse, staring at the sky. I don't know how long I sat there just staring; trying to see things that weren't there.

Fufu approached me and laid a tray on the table, I didn't look at it; I wasn't even hungry. She sat down next to me, scrutinizing me; but I just continued to look at the clear blue sky.