Homeward Bound | Regulus Black

Chapter Nineteen

Esme sat on the sofa in the living room, with an old blanket tugged over her shoulders. The past couple of days she managed to drag herself out of bed, and instead spent her day sat in the same spot on the sofa until it was time to go to bed again.
Sirius had been out and somehow scrounged them a new television for the house that sat in front of the sofa playing episodes of Fawlty Towers on loop.

"Haven't we seen this one before?" Regulus asked as he sat down beside her. With two mugs of coffee in his hands, he handed one to Esme and placed his one on the coffee table in front of them.

She shook her head, "I haven't seen this one before. Unless you've secretly been watching this without me, I think you're mistaken."
He chuckled, "Oh, did I forget to tell you? That's exactly what I've been doing."

Esme adjusted the blanket over her shoulders as she sat there cross-legged. For the first time that day, since she'd sat on the sofa - given it was just past midday - she took her eyes off the television to blow the steam off the top of her drink and then take a small sip.
"Are you not warm? It's roasting." Regulus remarked as he leant back in his seat.
She didn't immediately reply. She kept her eyes trained on the show, and after internally composing herself and swallowing the lump in her throat, she said, "I'm sorry."

Regulus turned to her. Esme pretended not to notice as he scanned over her features in silence. He then replied, "You don't have anything to be sorry for."
"Sorry." She repeated.
"For what?"
"It-it doesn't matter."

This didn't satisfy Regulus, though. Not in the slightest. He sighed, and then said, "It does matter. What are you apologising for?"
She responded, "Nothing. Sorry."
He raised an eyebrow, "Are you now apologising for apologising?"
"Maybe."

"Es, will you... If you're not going to look at me will you at least answer my question?"

Esme's grip on her mug tightened so much that her knuckles turned white and the veins in the back of her hands stuck out. She lowered her gaze to the milky tea, and struggled to find the words she was searching for. When she wanted to be, when she was in the right frame of mind, Esme could be particularly eloquent. But talking about this matter, in this state of mind, meant that there were no words. She never had been able to communicate her feelings, and even if she had she was certain there wouldn't be any words to describe how exactly she felt. What exactly it was like to go through what she went through.

"I'm sorry for being such a bother. I didn't want to ruin your day after you went to see the quidditch, and... I don't want to put you out." She said. Weirdly, she felt almost guilty for saying so.

Regulus sighed, "You don't need to apologise for feeling bad. Not ever. You're more important than any quidditch match."
"Even the World Cup final?"
He chuckled and leant across to press a kiss to the side of her head, "Especially a World Cup final."

"Oh, and will you remind me to thank Sirius later?"
"Thank him?"
Esme nodded, "Yeah, for getting the television and tapes. It was thoughtful, don't you think?"
Regulus smiled, "Yeah, it was. He's always been better with actions than words."

She hummed in response and tugged the blanket around her shoulders even tighter. Regulus took another sip from his mug, and then said, "I'm just going to get something from the kitchen. I'll be right back."
Esme nodded as he got up and quietly left.

Sat at the head of the table in the kitchen was Sirius Black, with his legs propped up on the table and the newspaper open in his lap.
"You alright?" He asked as he cast a glance towards his younger brother.

"Yeah," Regulus chuckled, "Not bad, thanks. How are you?"
Sirius smiled, "Peachy. I left your change on the counter, by the way."
"Thanks." He saw the money on the side and slid it into his pocket.

Sirius closed the newspaper and cast it aside on the table. He then lowered his feet back to the ground and turned around to face his younger brother. "That was a good idea of yours." He said.
Regulus rooted through the cupboards in search of a snack as he replied, "What idea?"
"The idea to get a working television and some stuff to watch. It'll help us all not die of boredom." Sirius clarified.

"That wasn't my idea." Regulus said.
"What?" Sirius frowned, "Yes it was. You asked me to go out and get it. You paid for it."
Regulus explained, "I told Esme it was your idea. I'm not taking credit."
"And... Why would you do that?"
He shrugged, "I don't know. I just don't really want her to know it was me. Besides, it'll keep you on her good side for a while."

Sirius stared at his brother for a long moment. It amazed him, on a regular basis, just what an amazing person his younger sibling had become.
"She's lucky to have you." Sirius told Regulus.
He smiled, lowered his head, and replied, "And vice versa."
Tutting in response, Sirius said, "I'm glad you're happy and all, but it doesn't half sicken me."

Regulus scoffed, then chuckled as he returned to the living room. As the door closed behind him, Esme turned to look up.
"Biscuits." He held up the packet.
A large grin emerged across her face, "Oh, nice one."

"Also," Regulus began as he sat back down beside her on the sofa and opened up the packet, "I was thinking about how... It seems like a while ago, now, but you'd wanted to go back to your old house. Do you still want to?"

Esme let out a light, surprising laugh. "Oh, I'd been so distracted I'd forgotten about that. Do you... You still think it's a bad idea, don't you?"
"Undoubtedly."
"And you want to come anyway?"
He shrugged, "Well, I'm not letting you go alone."

"Thank you." She replied quietly.
"No problem. Besides, I'm thinking Sirius will come too."
Esme raised an eyebrow, "Really?"
"Anything to get out of the house." Regulus replied, "Plus, it can't hurt to have someone else with us... Just in case something does go wrong." He picked a biscuit out of the packet and held it between his teeth. He then held the packet out towards Esme.

She smiled, took a biscuit for herself, and then took a small bite. "You can tell him that then." She told him.
Regulus chuckled, "Alright, that's fair. Just as long as it's on the record that I really don't want to do this."
"In that case, I'd just like to remind you that you're the one that brought this up."
"I know," He conceded, "But you'd have remembered eventually."
Esme smiled, again, "Yeah."

"I suppose there's a pretty high chance that your mother doesn't actually live there anymore." He pointed out.
"Oh," She smirked, "You're scared of my mother. I'd forgotten that."

"Woah, hold up." Regulus' voice rose in pitch, "Let's-let's not say scared."
Esme laughed airily as she lent into Regulus' side, rested her head on his shoulder, and curled her legs up to the side of her on the sofa. "What would you say then?"
He thought for a moment, then replied, "I think... I'm... Respectfully intimidated by her."

Pursing her lips to mask her grin, Esme responded, "Oh right?"
"Yes, it's different."
"Of course."
"It is!"
"Whatever you say, dear."

Regulus tutted and then settled his arm around her shoulders. "At least there's no chance of us running into your father."
Esme nodded in agreement, "That's for the best - he would actually murder you. And then probably me afterwards."

"Families are complicated, huh?"
"Yeah." She added, "Though I think ours are a little more complex than most."

Regulus pressed a kiss to the top of her head and mumbled into her hair, "You've got that right."