A CHANGE OF HEART ⇒ jjxpope

SEVEN

Sitting down onto the sofa, his hair wet and freshly washed; JJ glances towards Pope. Pope is skimming through channels, neither say a word; ergo, JJ simply lays his head down in Pope's awaiting lap, facing the television as Pope surfs through the various channels.

Pope instinctively begins to gently run his fingers through JJ's soft, blond hair; despite it still being damp. "You okay?" Pope asks quietly, his tone tender. "You've been awfully quiet since lunch with my parents?"

JJ nods. "M'fine," He replies quickly.

"JJ...." Pope trails.

Sighing, JJ closes his eyes for a moment. He remains silent for a while. "I just....fuck, I just wish I wasn't tying you down with all of....all of this," He eventually whispers, his voice barely above a mumble.

Pope shakes his head. "J, don't....don't say that," He tries.

JJ squeezes his eyes shut tighter before popping them open to finally face Pope. "We're fucked, Pope," He murmurs. "You know that right? Nothing can ever be how it used to be ever again," He starts. "College, everything we've both ever wanted, we might not even get any of it now!" JJ shivers raspily.

"Is this about what my mom said?"

"Pope-"

"About 'obstacles' and all of that shit?" Pope begins. "JJ, I don't care about what we might not get to do. I don't care about any of that right now. You know why?" Pope pauses, hesitating. "Because we're getting so much more than that and they're right inside of your belly, doesn't that amaze you?" Pope says softly.

JJ opens his mouth to speak but Pope continues. "Doesn't it amaze you that you're carrying a tiny, little piece of you and I and all that we've ever done inside of you?" Pope's voice is almost awe strucken. "And I know, J, I know that you're scared. I'm scared too. But we've got each other, we'll be okay,"

JJ can no find any better words than, "We've got Kie too," His voice is small and weak.

Pope looks down at him, becoming even more focused than he already had been on the blond's features. "Kiara? You told Kie?" He asks. "You told Kie before you told me....." Pope trails, his expression faltering to that of hurt.

JJ nods. "I didn't know what else to do, okay?" He shrugs, gazing up at Pope, squinting slightly.

"You could've.....you could've come to me! I'm the baby's dad!" Pope argues.

"What? So you could get up and walk out on me?" JJ snaps faintly, tiredly. "I was distressed and confused a-and scared......and about to terminate my pregnancy, for fuck sake, Pope! Speaking with you wasn't very high up on my list!"

"It should've been!" Pope says, exasperatedly. He looks away from JJ, adverting his gaze towards the television. "I'm sorry I walked out, I've said I'm sorry-"

"I'm sorry this, I'm sorry that! How come you're always the only one who just fucking sticks around enough to say sorry-" JJ cuts himself off with a small, low cry. He can not believe he is crying again.

As if running by raw, primitive instinctives, Pope gently wraps JJ within his arms; tugging the blond further into his lap. They rock for a minute until JJ croaks, "Do you.....do you even know how much better that makes you than everybody else?" He pauses. "Because you actually come back to say it?"

Pope sighs. He doesn't want to acknowledge the elephant in the room, but he knows he has to. "Your mom.....you're talking about your mom," He mumbles into the top of JJ's head.