The Fools of Amphidor

The Court Jesters

Around 5:30, we all met out in the hallway, ready to head out.

Max and Alfie had the same style of suit that I did, but with different pocket squares. We all matched uncannily. It was almost a little creepy.

"No, I'm not gonna let you raid the buffet table again," Alfie scoffed as they walked out of their room together, "Last time, you had nightmares."

"Aw, but I won't have nightmares again! I already had 'em once, this week!" Max had a puppyish look in his eyes.

"Hnhh... Fine! But I don't want to hear ANY crying, when you dream that giant shrimps are chasing you, again!" Alfie snipped.

Claire laughed, "Well, you guys were having an interesting conversation!"

"Oh- Hey, Claire!" Alfie faltered a bit, "Didn't recognize you with your hair down."

"This is a one-time thing," She rolled her eyes, "Don't get used to it."

"Nah, I like it," Alfie smiled, "Suits you."

She glared at him for a moment before we began walking, "So... where's this Town Hall."

"The map says that it's in the middle of town..." Max murmured.

"How do we get there?" Claire asked. "I've got it. Just follow me," Max started to lead us out of the hotel.

Alfie and Max held hands as they walked. It turned out that Max had absolutely no idea where we were going, so he was discreetly letting Alfie lead him along. He didn't want us to know that he was unsure of where to go. Claire and I pretended not to notice this.

We reached the Town Hall around 5:58. Just in time. Octavius greeted us outside.

"Hello, friends!" Octavius chimed as he saw us approaching. He was dressed in a suit much like our own, but his tie was that deep teal instead of just the pocket square, "Please come with me. I have to walk you onstage!"

"Wait, we don't have to talk, right?" Max asked, a twinge of panic in his strong voice.

"No, no! Of course not! You would be awful!" Octavius scoffed, "Most people don't know much English, so I will be speaking to them. You'll just have to stand there and look pretty!"

"Will there be food? I'm starving," Alfie asked.

"Yes, of course. I believe they're making something that you humans like to eat on the surface. Spaghetti?" He cocked his head a bit.

"I... guess?" Claire snorted a little.

"I mean, I hadn't really thought of it as black tie food, but I guess it'll do," Max nodded a bit, fully planning on engorging himself on the spaghetti.

Octavius chuckled and walked us inside. We looked around. We knew that this place would look strange, but I don't think we were quite prepared for the full effect. The building was carved out of the mouth of a large whale's skeleton. It was beautiful in a strange, horrific kind of way. Of course, the room was full of fish people and aquatic mammals alike. They were all dressed in their Sunday best, parting like a forked road as we approached the stage.

When we walked up on stage, a hush fell over the crowd as if someone had just dropped dead right in front of them. Octavius stepped up to the microphone and then tapped it. When he'd confirmed that it was on, his voice boomed out across the stadium. He spoke a strange language that sounded like a series of strange clicks and noises. After he'd take a break in speaking, the crowd would respond accordingly with cheering or laughing.

He pointed to us and said a couple of words. The crowd laughed for a moment and then broke into applause. I could feel my face getting red from embarrassment. We were just standing there, grinning stupidly.

"My god, if I have to smile for much longer, my face is gonna explode..." Claire said through her teeth.

I laughed a little. Octavius said one more thing before turning to us.

"I just told them that I'm giving you the envelope with your clue. Here it is," He took it out of his pocket and handed it to me, "Don't open it yet. Open it when you get back to your room."

We were all bursting with anticipation as to what the note actually said.

"Now, you'll get a total of two more clues after this, but you have to actually ask for them," Octavius explained, "Use them wisely."

"How do we ask for one if we need it?" I asked.

"You just come back here to city hall and ask the secretary for your second clue. She'll know who you are. Everyone does," Octavius promised, "Now... I'm going to go mill about the crowd. You four have a good night, alright?"

And at that, he left us onstage.

"I don't know how to feel about this," Claire murmured, "I mean, this whole party is for us, so they must be friendly, but... there's still just... something off."

"That's what I've been saying the whole time," Alfie huffed, crossing his arms.

"Are we really gonna fight about this, right now?" Claire rolled her eyes.

"I dunno about you guys, but I'm starving. I haven't eaten since lunch," Max walked off on his own.

"...I'm not going after him, this time," Alfie sighed, "I gotta have a break from shrimp intoxication."

I let out an exasperated noise, "I'll go after him. Make sure he doesn't eat the whole building."

So I followed Max over to the buffet table where Marceal stood, getting a plate. She looked perturbed by something. I tried not to let her spot me, but she did anyway.

"Dang it..." I murmured as she walked over.

"You let her get a dress from some other stylist?!" She hissed, "Why would you do that?! I thought we were friends! I mean, I told you some of my best stories!"

I had to restrain myself from rolling my eyes as she prattled on.

"...It doesn't even look good on her! I could have done so much better!" I don't even know if she was still talking about the dress at this point. I'm just filling in what I thought she said.

"It doesn't compliment her eyes or her skin and it fits wrong and--" I could see Max trying not to laugh behind her.

"...And I just feel so underappreciated because I said I would do it and you didn't tell her that I would do it even though I--" I had half a mind to interrupt her and go have "food poisoning" in the bathroom for the rest of the night like Claire did.

"...It just makes me SO mad! Mom was right, I should have gone to school to be a doctor because NOBODY would want to hire me as a--" I interrupted her.

"Look. I'm really sorry about the dress, but I can't listen to you right now. I've got something important that just came up and I need to-" I began.

"OHHH, SO NOW YOU'RE A BIG-SHOT, HUH?! CAN'T WAIT FOR FIVE MINUTES TO TALK TO THE PEOPLE WHO GOT YOU TO WHERE YOU ARE NOW?!" She huffed, "NOW I KNOW WHY THEY CALL YOU THE FOOLS OF AMPHIDOR!"

"...Wait, what?" I faltered.

"YEAH! They call you that because you're STUPID for coming here!" She hissed.

My jaw dropped. I could see Max's face get pale.

"...I wasn't supposed to tell you that," Marceal's expression turned to one of pure regret. Her eyes flashed to someone who was standing behind me, "I-I gotta go-"

She ran away. I glanced behind me. Nobody was there, but I saw a flash of a tentacle slinking back into the crowd.