Daughter of the Moon - Book Three: Fire

Chapter 21.4: Home

- Elara -

I could feel Zuko approaching me before I could see him, the boy somehow managing to sense the moment my spirit had returned to my body so that he could offer his assistance again. Perhaps I should have been furious with him for leaving his corner without my permission, but for some reason, I was too exhausted to care. Maybe it was the talk I had just had with Yue about the boy, or maybe it was the feeling of hundreds of butterflies that invaded my body the moment I realized he was coming to help me, but I could have sworn that a small part of me was actually excited to see that Zuko was so concerned about my well-being.

The world slowly came into focus as I could just barely hear Zuko speaking to me, his words slightly muffled as I came out of my spirit trance and reentered the real world. And I could just about make out his figure plopped down in front of me as he spoke, and it didn't take me too long to realize that my spiritual encounter was not the reason for my apparent blindness. I had a feeling that it had something to do with the tears.

"Elara!" Zuko yelped once I was able to understand what he was saying, my cheeks cold and wet from pouring my heart out to the Moon Spirit. "Elara, what's wrong?!"

I shook my head gently as I went to answer the boy, my body feeling sluggish as if I had just woken up from a long nap. "Nothing," I croaked slowly. "I'm fine."

"No, you're not," Zuko immediately refuted as he reached out to wipe my tears, his hands coming so close to my face that I could feel the warmth radiating from them. However, much to my surprise, he stopped, pulling his arms back and tucking them away as if he were punishing himself. He had refused to touch me ever since...well, ever since he had joined the group, and I couldn't understand why. It wasn't like him—not with me, anyway—and that worried me a little bit.

"Where are you hurt," he asked, completely glazing over his strange behavior like nothing had happened. "How can I help you?"

I looked up at the boy as I answered, the words leaving my lips before I even had a chance to think about them. "I said I'm fine!" I snapped, the strange chill to my voice surprising the both of us. "And I don't need you nagging me, so can you just back off?"

Zuko nearly tumbled backwards as I reprimanded him, but he was quick to recover, his face falling as he lost all the princely pride I had seen in him earlier. "I'm sorry," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "You want me to leave..."

Zuko didn't waste another moment before pulling himself to his feet, and after a moment of hesitation, he went to leave the cave. I wasn't too sure what he was planning to do—whether he was turning to leave for good or whether he was simply giving me a moment of peace—but I knew for a fact that I didn't want him to go. Something inside me screamed with every step he took, and it was almost unbearable.

So I called out to him.

"Wait!"

My voice echoed through the cavern as Zuko froze in place, the boy barely breathing at the mouth of the cave for fear that he would anger me. His fear was justified, of course—I had given him no reason to believe that I wouldn't throw a tantrum just because he existed, after all—but a part of me still wished that he would turn around. Perhaps I thought that if he were brave enough to face me, it wouldn't have been too late to fix everything, but he elected to hold completely still—an elegant statue silhouetted by the moonlight.

I took a deep breath before I rose from my seat to follow after him, placing myself right behind the boy as I tried to figure out what I could possibly say to explain how I was feeling. I suppose it was a good thing he hadn't turned to look at me right away like I had initially expected him to. I needed the time, not only to gather my wits, but also to gather my courage. There was no way I could possibly face him—especially now—but I couldn't shake the feeling that I needed to speak to him. So, I did the only thing I had the strength to do.