losing all control

Are you okay?

I stare into the mirror, wiping away my tearful eyes. Knock Knock!! "Um Shun, you okay in there?" My roommate Saiki calls from the outside of the bathroom door, I look around the bathroom making sure everything is perfect. "Yea Ku, I'm leaving now." I tug on my sleeve nervously before opening the door. Outside I see Ku standing out the bathroom door with his usual nonchalant expression. "What do you want to eat tonight? I'll buy." Saiki says when he sees me open the door. "Oh- um I'm not hungry tonight! I had a big lunch." I lie anxiously. "M'kay, I'm guessing you're going to bed early again?" He walks towards the kitchen. "Uh- yea good night Kusuo." "Yea night." I give him a weak smile, I can see Ku look upset. He probably hates me.

I plop down on my bed. My wrist stings, I hate that feeling. But I cannot seem to stop. I wished someone cared enough to notice. I envy Kusuo, he's gets good grades and people ask him out all the time. He has options. I admire him, he is so cool, handsome, and mysterious. He doesn't need to be saved from bullies or his own father. He's calm and collected, he doesn't cut himself after a small problem. I fall to sleep thinking about Kusuo.

I wake up to something shaking me softly, I open my eyes to see a Saiki shaking me awake. "Get up idiot, schools in 40 minutes." I shot up and run to the bathroom. "Why didn't you wake me up earlier?!?!" I cry. "You looked tired, I already packed your school shit and made breakfast. So, stop yelling and and get dressed" Saiki states before walking into his room. I let out a little "Oh" before getting dressed. I pull out a normal everyday outfit before getting dressed. I walk out to the kitchen and see Saiki eating on the couch.

"Are you ready to go?" I ask. 'Yea, are you gonna eat?" he responds "No, I'll get something from the vending machines." Saiki gives me a weird look, before putting on his shoes. "Hmm"

We walk towards the building, Nendo, Hairo, and Aren end up joining us but other than an 'Hey!' and the occasional 'Mhm' I don't really tune into the conversation. At the entrance me, Saiki and Aren split from the couple because we all have first period together. "I have to use the bathroom" I say turning away from the two. "I'll go with you, we will meet you in the classroom Saiki." Aren smiled walking behind me. We walk into the bathroom, and I pace to the stall. Why'd he come with me, it only makes me a bigger problem.

"Um Hey Kaidou?" Aren calls me from the outside of the stall. "Yea? What's up?"

"Are you okay?"

475 words

A/N: I'm not really good at these types of fanfics so if u have any advice or can help with me with grammar also im sorry this chapter is short if ppl like this i will make the next chapter longer^^