Ruedelia's Repose

F I V E

Around thirty minutes later, my phone buzzed in my purse and I dug it out, finding Jordan's name illuminated on my screen.

"What's up?", I answered, watching Silas walk, absent-minded, from the corner of my eye. He was leisurely keeping pace with me, looking ahead, but he wasn't really seeing anything.

"Where are you?", Jordan interrogated.

I looked away from Silas and sighed. "We just left the park. We're on our way back.", I told him, hoping to alleviate whatever was making him worry.

Jordan sighed on the other end. "Alright.", he replied, sounding a lot like our father. "When you get back we're leaving."

I fought off a sigh a relief at being let off the hook with Jordan, and focused, instead, on the stronger sinking feeling that came with knowing I'd have to part ways with Silas.

"Okay.", I conceded, before asking, "Is Thomas leaving too?"

I needed to know so I could make him leave if he wouldn't.

He had a football game the next day and I'd be damned if he messed up because he decided to stay and drink some more.

Jordan snorted. "You'll have to drag him out of here."

I shook my head. "What else is new?", I grumbled, and Jordan chuckled.

"I'll see you when you get back."

"Yeah.", I hung up, dropping my phone back in my purse and pulling out my J from earlier along with a lighter.

I held the partially smoked roll out to Silas. "Wanna hit?"

He studied my face and then my outstretched hand for a moment before he took the joint silently and stopped walking as he placed it between his lips then held out his hand for the lighter. I shook my head. "Let me.", I said, and Silas leaned down so I could light it.

He didn't take his eyes off of me as he inhaled and blew a bit of the smoke into my face. A devilish smirk lifted the corners of his mouth, and I frowned warily.

My cautiousness was relieved, however, when he asked, "You know how to shotgun?", and I nodded.

Silas took my agreement as an opening, and stepped forward to boldly pull me closer by my waist as he inhaled from the joint again, grabbed my chin, and blew what he'd inhaled into my mouth. I breathed him in along with the weed and, with hooded eyes, blew the smoke back into his face. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, then let out a groan I barely heard.

I smiled and stepped away from him.

"I haven't even done anything yet."

Silas huffed out a laugh and passed me the joint. "Exactly.", he grumbled.
•
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•
By the time we made it back, most of the party goers were gracing Grace's front lawn with their drunken presences, while others stumbled sloppily along with their designated drivers to cars as others tried their best to look as not drunk as they could walking back to their homes.

They all looked horrible, and I scoffed.

Silas shot me a curious look. "What?", he asked, and I gestured to the scene playing out in front of us.

"This." I waved my hand carelessly in a random direction. "The partying, the partiers. All of it.", I continued. "I don't get it."

"Getting shit faced in some strangers house with a bunch of strange people on strange drugs is not my definition of a good time.", I explained. Silas hummed and side stepped a guy puking into the bushes Tommy had stretched his legs into earlier.

I grimaced and nudged Silas to move faster through the front door.

"This really isn't your thing.", he laughed, and I rolled my eyes for the millionth time that night.

"Have you been listening to me, or is that jock head of yours really as empty as all the stereotypes say?", I questioned, giving him side eye as we ascended the stairs, and, although my tone had given way to condescending sarcasm, I was genuinely curious.

On top of being calm and level headed, Silas seemed so captivating and full of substance. I knew, though, that people could be incredible actors and actresses when they really wanted to be. I was just hoping that that wasn't the case.

Thankfully, Silas proved me wrong when he replied, "I can't exactly go off of your word, now can I?"

I stopped walking when we reached the door to the room we'd left earlier and gave him a look that conveyed how attention grabbing his words had been.

"What's that supposed to mean?", I asked, humorously offended, but Silas didn't seem deterred by the underlying seriousness in my voice..

He proceeded with, "As interested as I am in getting to know you, I'm not foolish enough to trust you completely, Rue.", he confessed, and the admission made me more curious than upset.

He had a valid point.

Silas and I had been around each other for years, but we'd never held a proper conversation before tonight, so his distrust was only human.

The interesting thing, however, about his distrust was that, according to everything he'd told me about his family, he had no reason to be so reluctant to let me in outwardly—a fact that only made me more determined to solve the puzzle that was Silas Graham—and I could only think of a few reasons why he'd feel that way.

The first reason, I decided, was probably due to the rumors he'd undoubtedly heard about me around school.

The rumors ranged from basic and harmless to heavy and nasty, and half of them were true.

For the second reason, I considered our odd chemistry.

Considering what Silas said about his first time seeing me, there had always been a connection between the two of us that had come out of no where.

A feeling so hard to understand and borderline fairytale was liable to be mistrusted, and I silently sent Silas props for his level head and willingness to accept his emotions with such candor—even if he had ignored what his mind had demanded of him for so long, he'd never discredited the feelings or given me hell for his own confusion.

The fact that he was being honest about avoiding me was a good sign.

It meant that he didn't see a point in lying
or omitting the truth, and it seemed as though the only thing that stopped him was—

I paused.

What was stopping him?

What had stopped him?

We stood in comfortable silence for a moment before I spoke.

"Ah, so you're an 'actions speak louder than words' kinda guy?", I teased.

Silas narrowed his eyes at me, like he was trying to figure out what I was getting at, but I only smiled.

Like I always did.

"If you think you're a hard code to crack, lover boy, you've got another thing coming.", I warned him, but I knew I was lying to the both of us as I opened the door and gestured him in.

The look on Silas's face told me he knew it was a lie too.