( √ ) his name was jimin | pjm

chapter three

CHAPTER
THREE

━━━━━━━━━━

Bright rays of sunlight fought their way through the thick and dark curtains, blocking any view outside and making the room seem duller than it was; completely devoid of light. Grumbling tiredly and still keeping my eyes closed, I turned to the side again and sighed softly to myself, not yet ready to get up and start the day somehow. My motivation reserves were completely depleted without Jayoung and I had no idea how to fill them up again, preferring not to get up at all and flee back to the land of dreams where Jayoung and Jimin were waiting for me.

Jimin!

Shocked, my eyelids fluttered open and I sat bolt upright in bed while my focus was completely on the CD player. The new radio smiled straight at me with its beige color and seemed as innocent as Jimin's voice sounded. I could only vaguely remember what his last words were that were stored on the CD and which I had let play for the first time yesterday. Instead, I remembered what feelings this strange but beautiful voice had triggered in me, and it was indescribable. It was strangely familiar, and I could say 100% that I had never heard Jimin's voice before, nor did I know any Jimin. None.

It also brought a strange calming over me, made me come down and relax. The night was actually quite pleasant for me, and that was even with the knowledge that Jayoung was on a plane, on his way to a completely foreign country. Even the last few nights were a horror for me, as knowing what was about to happen just completely wore me down and worrying about Jayoung literally ate me up. Any bad scenarios played out in my head like mind movies and stirred me up so that my tongue was on the verge of screaming at Jayoung every time until it stayed with me after all. But yesterday was different. Yesterday I had listened to the angel himself.

Smiling at that, the corners of my mouth pulled up and an unknown joy flooded me, before my fingertip was already pressing down the button of the radio again, making sure that the honey-sweet voice organ could sweeten my day once more. Actually, I started a normal day with the singing voices of my favorite band EXO tearing me from sleep and I stayed in bed until the end, so that I could hear everything, every vocal that was sung literally absorbed with my ears and brought joy to my heart, but apparently every start of the day from now on would begin with Jimin. And against it I had not even what.

•••

Far too distracted by Jimin's voice, my chopsticks poked around more in the food than I really took in, preferring to listen to the young man's narration.

"Sometimes... There, I don't think people have ever really registered me like that. Honestly, I've accidentally overheard a conversation before - okay, not accidentally. I was just getting something from my locker at the time and overheard someone start a conversation about me and instead of walking away and leaving it on that, I hid and kept listening. They didn't know anything but my name. I was just Jimin. Nothing more. Not the nice Jimin. Not the quiet Jimin. Not the one who likes to help others and smiles at everyone in hopes it will make their day better. Nothing. Whoever is listening to this right now...I think you can understand that this hurts me, right?"

Almost subconsciously, I managed a nod, being far too shocked by this story the strange boy was revealing to me.

The clock had meanwhile already struck 1 o'clock to the afternoon and as so usual I managed it only now to come to the meal. Earlier I was too deeply busy still a little to learn and make break from the CD, which was apparently quite long. But Jimin had divided everything well, practically like episodes. The first CD contained 20 such episodes, so far of varying length, but I didn't care. I could listen to it forever, if he told something, be it still the biggest crap.

I had planted myself in the kitchen, with a bowl of stew in front of me, while I dragged the CD player down with me to keep listening, almost addicted to the sound of the boy's voice. Judging from a few of his own descriptions, I imagined him to be really cute - rather childlike and small, innocent and kind. Much like his voice sounded. He had a gentle nature and possessed a lot of empathy, loving to take care of his fellow man, though so many didn't even care what his name was. Everyone else, on the other hand, only knew his name, not wanting to know anything more. Yet he was so much more than that.

"I am more than just a name," was a statement he made forcefully to it, before pure silence was heard again, absorbed in thought for his next sentences, but the silence was quite okay and not oppressive.

It was sad. His life was sad. I couldn't even do anything about it, as much as I wanted to, because this boy didn't deserve anything bad in the world, was such a gentle and tender being himself, who put others before himself and just wanted some love himself. But in this unfair world it was not granted to him.

At least until now. Although I knew him only through recordings, the desire crept into my heart to give his life another 180° turn and give him back what he had earned with every fiber of his body.

And soon enough I would start doing that, just had to find out where Jimin was. A certain name crept into my head and there was no hiding a grin, after all I could add a certain boy to my friends list who felt like he knew the whole world and even more than just the name of one person mentioned. If he couldn't help me, who else could?