"Why on earth would you get this shitfaced?"
"Why would anyone get this drunk?" she countered, glaring at me with her eyes closed.
"You said 'that's the point' when I told you you were going to get hurt. You were going to hurt yourself." My...
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"You're a fucking idiot."
"This isn't my fault."
"HOW ON EARTH IS THIS NOT YOUR FAULT?" Leander's voice nearly made my ears bleed. The lady standing in front of me in the grocery line turned to look at me, a foul frown on her lips. "I leave for three weeks and you've already gotten grounded?" It was Lee's first year in college, and he'd chosen to go across the country to study for something he could've easily learned back in our hometown.
I scowled, pushing my cart forward as the line moved. "We both knew this was going to happen when you left. I'm just surprised it was fine for so long. And I'm surprised that me coming home at three in the morning was their breaking point."
Leander's sigh was heavy. "Monroe...you can't be staying out that long. You got there two days ago, I— You don't even know the area well. You could get lost. It's not safe."
My hands froze above the grocery items I was putting on the sliding belt. "Are you taking their side?" I asked slowly, eyes widening in disbelief. I wouldn't admit that he had a point—we had moved to Colorado a couple days ago.
"They're worried about you, Monroe," he said, firmer this time, "and they have every reason to be. You're scaring me. Do I need to come home?"
I stiffened. We're worried about you echoed through my head. They had nothing to be worried about. I was perfectly fine. "No," I replied flatly. "No, you don't. Have fun at college, Lee. See you at Christmas." He began sputtering, but I already ended the call. Someone snapped their fingers at me and I blinked. The lady behind the register was scanning my items and glared at me. I pocketed my phone, the scowl returning.
I hated this place already.
"Do you need any help?" my mom asked from my doorway.
What she didn't know is that I'd been sitting in the middle of my room, staring at the wall, for the past two hours. Boxes surrounded me, towering over me and caging me in.
"I'm good," I murmured. She hummed in response, and left without another word. The sun glared through my window and warmed my hair. I just stayed seated. I was so tired. Tired of feeling like...this. It had been three weeks since Leander left for college. Since he wanted to go across the country, my parents thought it was a fantastic idea to pack up our things and move to what they considered the middle of America. That way, we were closer to him, and more likely to be close to me no matter where I went.
The only problem was that since Leander went out of state first, my parents prioritized his tuition. I either pay my own out of state...or they help pay if I stay in state. Either way, it was obvious that Leander was getting the most out of this.
So now, I was miles away from my hometown and my very few friends, and my brother—who was basically my best friend. There would be no more 2am ice cream runs or sneaking out to watch movies or go driving. No movie nights after panic attacks, no moments where we relax in his room after our parents fight again.
I was alone.
My phone rang next to me and I dragged my eyes over to it. The profile picture I had for my best friend, Mira, appeared. A spark appeared in my chest, but quickly went out. Did I really have the energy for this? I rubbed my eyes, pinched my cheeks, turned on my light, and answered, forcing the biggest smile to appear on my face.
"Monroe!" she screamed.
"MIRA!" I shouted back, laughing. "How are you? It feels like it's been forever since I've seen you!" I set her up on the window and squinted against the sunlight that was reflecting off of the house in front of me. "Is it boring there without me?"
She cackled, tight black curls bouncing with the movement. "Absolutely. I almost drove over to your house to pick you up to get pizza like we normally did, but..." She pouted. "Then I remembered you moved to frickin' Colorado."
I giggled, my face already tired from forcing this much emotion on it. "Yeah..."
"How has it been going? Are the time zones messing you up yet?"
I nodded. "You bet. I start school on Monday and my mom expects my room to be unpacked by then, so... I'm definitely going to make an impression on people by appearing half-asleep and still in pajamas."
She laughed again, rubbing her face. "It'll be fine. It's your senior year. You just have to make it through that and then you're done. Besides, it's only the last week of August. I bet people aren't even used to their classmates by now."
"Unless you've been going to that school since freshman year," I pointed out. Mira groaned and waved me off. She yelled at me to unpack my boxes and pick out my outfit. I talked to her for the rest of the night, and managed to get a lot of unpacking done. Enough to fill my closet with shirts and jackets, and a mattress on the floor. But as soon as the phone call was over, that emptiness came back, and I barely slept for the rest of the night.
