we are inevitable | jakehoon

fourteen.

The day they meet at the cafe is ridden with an unshakeable sense of finality before they even step in. It's their favourite cafe, the one near their college they frequented often while they were studying. The cakes there are, as they've both grown to realise over the four years, twice the quality for half the price.

As it is, those intricacies don't matter. Their conversation kickstarts itself the second they lock eyes, and they don't even make it into the cafe.

This was just a matter of time.

Matter of time.

Is that supposed to make things easier? Jake doesn't think so.

"Sunoo, look at me."

All he can bring himself to do is shake his head, eyes downcast as he furiously avoids Jake's eyes with all the determination he can pull from deep down. Jake places his hands on Sunoo's cheeks gently, lifting his face to meet his eyes.

"Look me in the eye and tell me to go, if you mean it," he says softly. "If you can't do it, then I'll stay. I'll stay, and we...we can make this work. Tell me the truth, Sunoo."

Sunoo blinks away tears, and his gaze hardens as it meets Jake's eyes, resolute.

"It's okay," he says. "I'll be okay."

Jake doesn't let go of him in the seconds that pass after; Sunoo's eyes are like the escaping sunset, vibrant in its last moments, and all his mind screams at him to do is to hold on tight as he slips away.

He thinks of the night they first met, really met, a fire, a crowd, a field, an open sky, a star, two golden strings, and a boy. He thinks of the nights that followed, happiness, sorrow, laughing, crying, comfort, warmth, and a steady heartbeat always next to him.

There's something about the soulmate stars they've never ever learned about in any class throughout their education. Jake wonders if it's because they don't think people will ever encounter it in their lifetime, or if it's simply because even science can't find an explanation for it.

The soulmate strings, like any other terrestrial string existing on this Earth, can be broken. When soulmate strings are cut, a deliberate choice is made; the action is irreversible, the most final of all finality. It can never be replaced. Once soulmate strings are cut, they pull the star from the sky in a sunshower of brilliant gold, letting gravity pull it towards the earth. The star ignites into a supernova of gold as it disintegrates into the atmosphere, like a bittersweet finale to a bittersweet ending, a last burst of brilliance before everything disappears for good.

All of this is in theory. Jake has never seen this happen in all his twenty-two years of life.

"Walk away, Jake," Sunoo says, not breaking his gaze. "Walk away right now, and don't ever look back. I don't know if I'll be able to let you go, if you do."

He watches Sunoo's eyes fall and he steps back, turning around to leave. In the next moment he's walking away, away from his destiny, away from his fate, away from the only person in the world who'd ever willingly given up everything so he could be happy. There's one last thing he has left to do before he leaves; the last thing he will ever do for Sunoo, for the person who was destined to be his love, who ended up being less but so, so much more.

As he forces his eyes closed to stop the tears from spilling over, something snaps, something so tangible he feels it deep down inside him.

Like a parachute harness detaching from him mid-drop, suspended between heaven and Earth. One second he's enveloped in belts and straps that secure him tightly, everything synonymous with the word 'safety'.

The next he's free-falling, and it's too late to stop.

Stripes of radiant gold seep into the sky in his periphery, bleeding further into the pink and blue and orange with every step he takes. The lump in his throat choking back his tears doesn't allow him to look up.

As the last streaks of sunset disappear from the sky, he doesn't look back.

─

"It's been years since you two broke up, Jake," Heeseung says, worry coloring the tone of his voice. "What if he doesn't feel the same way anymore?"

"That'll be my consequence to bear."

"But you'll have left Sunoo for nothing, then," the older boy continues. "Don't you think it's unfair to him?"

"That's not the way things work, hyung-"

"You think it'd be fairer to him for me to spend the rest of my life with him, in love with someone else? You think it'd be fair if I took him back if Sunghoon rejected me? You think it's fair for him to live his life thinking he'll always be my second choice?"

"It isn't fair, Heeseung. The universe wasn't fair to any of us."