Hello, readers!
It's been a while since I've posted any updates, and I feel as if I owe some of you reasoning. So, this is for those who have supported my work and have supported my writing through the years:
Wow, it's been a long journey! It's been an amazing journey filled with some amazing stories, reads, moments, and characters. A lot of us have grown together, collaborated and spent moments discussing endless possibilities to our stories. I believe that our relationship together—as co-readers (and co-writers)—wouldn't have been possible without a platform such as this. Above our mutual relationship founded on books, I've found true friends through this site.
Some of my greatest friendships formed from this platform, and I am immensely grateful for that. I am grateful for the time we've spent being friends (regardless of our status), and I am thankful for those who I remain in contact with to this day.
With that being said, I've thought a lot about this account and this platform as a whole.
I've tried to reinvent myself on Wattpad to keep up with the times—to fit myself into the mold of the very thing that gave people opportunities and opened doors. I found this platform at a time where stories were bubbling forth and bursting from my mind, and I posted with rose-colored glasses and the idea that I would see partnerships, gain recognition, and more. My ultimate goal was to become a published author and to obtain an audience for when I finally decided to publish for the world-at-large. However, I'd been passed over so many times, it became redundant and time-consuming to keep posting and updating.
I'd had my work stolen, a drop in readership, and found myself disenchanted with this platform. I saw my white counterparts achieve recognition for the same things I was doing (if not, more), and watched as awards were always slotted against me. I watched as the same storylines with the same face claims achieved status and attention. I watched as everything eventually became recycled and the writing became subpar to where I didn't even want to read on this app.
I'd given so much of my time to writing and creating stories for those who didn't have a voice that I'd lost mine along the way. I slaved over stories that would bring the characters I loved to life and filled readers with hope, only to feel disenfranchised and forgotten.
I'd spent a little over a year as a Wattpad Ambassador some years ago, and found myself feeling even further on the fringe of the writing community. I'd begun questioning whether my writing was actually good—if it was worth pursuing my degree in English (Creative Writing), and if I had what it took to be a writer.
I found that I had placed a lot of my love for writing and reading into this site to get nothing in return. This is why I haven't posted much of anything new or bothered to update. Why would I spend time crafting stories for an audience who didn't care about the work I was putting out? Why would I spend time updating when the readership was low and those who did support my work no longer felt accepted on this app? With the decline of users—at least in my following—how was I going to get anyone to recognize all the hard work I'd put in?
These are questions I've asked myself over a dozen times, and the answers never get any easier to digest.
I still love writing, and I've been doing so offline for a while now. I've been filling word documents with colorful stories of beautiful people—all of them that I want to share with each and every one of you. But my heart isn't fully in it.
What keeps these stories from being like the rest of mine? What will suddenly change the engagement, bring my following and users back to the app?
Until there are definitive answers for that...until I feel appreciated...I feel it's best to keep my work to myself.
One day, maybe even soon, I'll decide to post again. Start fresh. Reconnect with you all in the way I'd always hoped.
But for now, all I can do is thank you for the support you've allotted me and the time we've spent creating together.
Thank you,
Tahryah
