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lately lifes been chill, quan's been around helping me w school & my brother and i have gotten closer than ever. quan my brother and i are gonna go get lunch in an hour.
"(2) messages from big brother❤️🩹"
i opened them, sitting down on my bed.
big brother❤️🩹 aye yk quan bringing his lil gf? i just wanted to tell u befo you get there bc you hate her sm.
me nah i didnt know, its wtv ill still go. read at 1:03 pm.
his girlfriend pissed me off so much bro, she treat me like im some competition. i dont want quan, never did i want him. she acts like quan isnt a loyal man. not once has he cheated on her. or treated her wrong.
anyways, im not gonna let this bitch kill my mood. i decided to put my hair inna quick slick back and lazily do my edges. ian have no one to impress.
i put on a orange sweater, and some orange cargo pants. i put on some orange and black air jordan one's.
i got in my car and turned on "poison" by brent. i stopped at the gas station to grab some tylenol since my head was killing me. as i took my pill i decided to text quan.
me you couldn't tell me your girl was coming?
quan. it was last minute sev, im sorry. i know youn fw her, she really likes you i hope yall can get to know eachother better. i see u as a lil sister to me.. it means a lot to me that yall like eachother. read at 2:04 pm.
for some reason the fact that he saw me as a sister to him hurt. i liked quan but i just didnt know i liked him like that yk? anyways i drove to the restaurant and walked in seeing my brother.
"hey lil mama, how u been ?"
"i've been okay dae, i miss u being at home"
"i know baby, i'll be home soon" dae said pulling me into a hug and kissing my forhead.
he really babies me, and i love it girl. we got seated and saw quan & his girl walk in.
"wsg brobro" quan said pulling dae into a hug & dapping him up.
"hey sev, yk ciara.. ciara yk sev"
"mhm" i said grabbing my phone.
"dont start sevyn" quan whispered to me.
i wish he would get his hot breath ass outta my hear tf. the waiter came around & asked for our orders.
"um can i just have chicken strips & fries? for sauce i want blue cheese & bufflao sauce please" i said looking up realizing how fucking fine the waiter was.
the waiter licked his lips and nodded, "will that be all ma?"
i giggled. everyone calls me that but he just said it different. it gave me butterflies, like quan.
"yea that'll be all nigga be gone, stay away my my sister." dae said sliding his shirt up to show his gun.
but it didnt scare him, he snuck a smirk at me and walked away. i
"hoeing around i see" ciara murmured.
"still looking like a crackhead who sucks dick for 1$ i see"
quan & dae cackled as quiet as they could knowing we still heard em.
"you're mad im sucking quans dick & ur not"
"no need to make an announcement, i can tell u sucking somebody dick by those donkey teeth in yo mouth.." i sighed smiling.
"go try to kill yourself again bitch"
i sat there for a second, i smiled. she didn't know what i was capable of because i promise quan i'd try not to get physical with her. but i said TRY. im done trying.
in one quick move i kicked her in her coochie. i don't normally do that, but i needed something new.
"try being infertile" i winked at her as both quan & dae yelled at me.
i didn't gaf, i pushed dae out of the booth & walked to the front. i see the waiter & slide him my number.
i sped down the freeway listening to "too fast" by sonder. what she said didn't weigh on me because i used to be suicidal, it weighed on me because she embarrassed me. my brother never knew that i did that.
ciara and i had a bond, a strong one & honestly i don't know what happened. she was the only one that knew about that.
my eyes filled with tears. i tried so hard not to let them fall. making my vision get cloudy. i didnt care, i sped up. everytime i feel life getting better for me i fuck up. every fucking time bro.
