THE BOULEVARD OF BROKEN DREAMS

NINE (ISELEN POV)

"This is a mistake, a very bad idea..." I croon inside my head while driving down an avenue in Hollywood Hills. Ruby's sitting next to me and tries to keep a straight face, although her delight is visible in every gesture and restrained smile despite I get the impression that she's uncomfortable putting pressure on her bruised buttocks, fortunately for her my house isn't far from work and it only takes half an hour by car because we managed to avoid the traffic jam.

I know it's a mistake and I'm lying to myself, I told Ruby se needed a little of vanilla sex to feel confident about our relationship and to trust me, she needed the warmth of another human being, but that's not true: getting more emotionally attached to me is exactly the last thing my sub needs, getting involved in my private life and jumping in my bed. I should pass her to Ivory, that's a good idea... But there's a problem: I feel incredibly possessive towards her. The moment those words came out of my mouth in the Boulevard of Broken Dreams, I knew I couldn't do it, I wouldn't let my employee lay a finger on this woman. Ruby belongs to me... Possessiveness makes me feel awkward but I can't help it because Ruby Rose has got under my skin.

I'm in big trouble: I can't pass her to Ivory without feeling jealous, I can't keep a strictly professional relationship with Ruby because she'd fall apart, I feel overwhelmed because our relationship is getting more and more personal, I know I'm making a mistake and yet, here I am taking my sub to my home to meet my cat... But worst of all, as a Dom and therapist, I'm supposed to tightly control my emotions instead of letting myself be carried away by them and I can't show weaknesses so talking to her about how nervous I feel, almost scared, actually, is out of question. I'm supposed to guide Ruby and provide comfort, she's paying me to do that, not to be overwhelmed by my own insecurities.

"We're here," I whisper taking the remote to open the gate. Damn it, nothing went the way it was supposed to. I was dying to see her to talk about her work, about the crew and new friends she's made, about her future plans... and to play a little and have a shower together later, as I promised. I knew she was dying to see me too and I felt anticipation like butterflies fluttering in my stomach, it's been a while since the last time I grinned like that while doing my makeup and picked a gorgeous set of lingerie. And suddenly, she started yelling at me like crazy.

I didn't understand what was all about at first and, when I finally realized what the problem was, the truth is that I understood her despite I was feeling angry hearing her disrespectful tone. There're good reasons to maintain the confidentiality in the club and this is one of those, this is why I don't like when my clients bump into each other in the corridors, it's not only about being discreet. But that stupid artist ruined everything when she showed up at my door unexpectedly and Ruby has suffered the consequences, well, her delicate butt skin has suffered. I shouldn't have been so harsh to her, I'm not interested in Blood Play, to be honest, and Medusa is usually in charge of pleasing the extreme masochists. I bet my employee would laugh I she sees me so worried about a small, accidental wound.

At least, I got something good from this unpleasant situation: I caught a glimpse of the future Ruby for a second while she was arguing with me claiming that she was sure about her feelings for me, she looked so confident, firm and strong, standing in front of me, looking at me with her flawless jaw clenched. Perfect... I'm very proud of her progress. That's the woman she's always been but remains hidden, buried under a ton of insecurities and fears and I'm going to draw her out.

Concerning whether Ruby loves me or she's mistaking her gratitude for something else... I guess time will tell.

"Oh my God, is that Sunset Strip?"

"Yes, the house is built on four terraces and they all overlook the city. It'd be difficult for me to maintain a garden with green grass and all that, I wouldn't be able to enjoy it anyways due to my work schedule so this was the best solution for me. The master bedroom with ensuite bathroom, walk-in-closet and an office is on the top floor and I can see the ocean from the terrace. On the floor below there're two bedrooms with bathrooms and a gym... This is the main floor with an open concept: there's a kitchen, dining area and a living room. The floor-to-ceiling windows can be fully opened and the dining room turns into an outdoor space, almost... And on the last floor, right below us, there's a covered lounge area with the swimming pool, a sunbathing deck and a home theatre room. And, even if I don't have a garden, there're plants in pots all over the outdoor staircase connecting the living room terrace with the swimming pool."