When Esp CH is going to apply for a job, someone had the balls to put a banana peel on the stairs, and it made him slipped. Because of that, he's going to find the person who did that, and shit on his head.
Disclaimer: I know nothing about macross or its plot... well, I know some of it, but not all of it. So for any macross fans out there, sorry for butchering macross. With that being said, let's start the show, or fanfic, cuz this is a fanfic.
XXX
Characters & Their Bio:
#1
Name: Esp CH
Age: 12 Yrs Old
Birth Year: April 1, 1987
Gender: Male
Species: Human
Likes: Gravy, fries, and urinal
Dislikes: Banana peel
History: His parents abandoned him, and in return, he abandoned them. He travels from place to place until he finds a job. But then, this happened.
Appearance:
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#2
Name: Trashsus
Age: 14 Yrs Old
Birth Year: November 1, 1985
Gender: Male
Species: Human
Likes: Trash, garbage, and sussus moogus
Dislikes: That one guy who keeps saying "Stop posting about amog us"
History: Thrown out by his parents for being sussy, and now, he lives on the streets with his trusty garbage helmet.
Appearance:
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XXX
In July 17, 1999, the whole world knew that they were not alone in the universe. A giant spaceship crash landed on Earth. The peace was already this close to collapsing, and now, a giant ass spaceship decides to almost breaking it.
I was there when it happened, the crashing of the alien ship, I mean. I'm in Australia where the crash site is close to it. It crashed somewhere in the Pacific Ocean.
Yeah, I'm just bullshitting with you. Nobody knows the exact location where it crashed. Except the government... probably. But the world does know it crashed somewhere in the Pacific Ocean.
I feel like this is going to start a giant mecha vs giant alien war. And yes, I have watched the movie. And I have to say, the first movie is based and poggers. The second movie however... yeah, let's just pretend that didn't exist.
Trashsus: Ayo wtf, are you ignoring me and monologuing inside that twisted head of yours, pal?
And here, you will meet this guy, my bestfriend since we found each other in the same street, and ever since that day, I now know that this guy is one of my people.
Esp: *Snorts* No. How about you mind your own damn business, huh?
Trashsus: Yeah, yeah, keep telling yourself that. Anyway, have you heard of that giant alien spaceship that crashed somewhere in the Pacific Ocean?
Esp: Yes, Trashsus, I feel like everyone in the damn world knows about this. Except for the ones who lives under a rock.
Trashsus: *Sips Iced Tea* This Earl Gray taste good though. *Continues to sip*
Esp: You're right. That Earl Gray taste good... except it isn't Earl Gray at all. It's Iced Tea.
Trashsus: *Proceeds to spit it out at Esp's face* W-what da facc, bro?! Why didn't you tell me?
Esp: *Wipes the spit and the Iced Tea* Cuz... *Continues to wipe* It is more funny to see you drinking on what seems to be like a piss, even though it's Iced Tea.
Trashsus: Wait, is it Iced Tea or piss? You gotta tell me, man! I'm going to die of leptospirosis or something like that! *Shakes Esp by the collar of his hoodie*
Esp: *Smacks away his hand* Jeez, calm down. It's Iced Tea, okay? And don't ever do that again. Makes me wanna puke if you shake me hard like an earthquake.
Trashsus: I really don't care though. Kinda sus if you put a piss in my drink. I'm not that Italian golden donut hair dude, okay, pal?
Esp: *Looks into the distance, which is the Pacific Ocean* No. I don't think I will.
Trashsus: What did you say?
Esp: *Sigh* Look, I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart that I don't give a single fuck, capiche?
Trashsus: ...Whatever. *Sip tea, anyway*
Esp: *Continues to look at the large blue liquid that is the Pacific Ocean* 'Oh shoot, what date is it today?'
I look at the calendar on my watch. Yes, I built it myself. The date today: [October 15, 1999]
Esp: 'Tomorrow is another day where I find another job, then not get the job cuz society, reality, and life sucks ass.' *Sigh*
Whoever said life is full of, well, life is a complete psychopath. Screw you and your definitions. Your definitions sucks ass.
Trashsus: You're monologuing again, aren't you?
Esp: Shut.
Trashsus: *Shrugs* Whatever you say, chief. *Sips tea... again*
Esp: So... wanna join the airforce?
Trashsus: What kind of airforce are we talking about?
Esp: I don't know, the kind where you shoot down enemies like in Ace Combat?
Trashsus: Eh, sure, why not.
Esp: Great. I already signed the papers. Let's go.
We go to the nearest military air base to signed up, but then, something happened. As I was walking up the stairs, Trashsus warned me about something.
Trashsus: Wait, Esp! Look out!
But it was too late. I already climbed the stairs... and I didn't noticed the banana peel on it. And so, what follows is a hilarity that most people won't ever forget.
Esp: *Slips on the banana peel* Oh well, I didn't need my head anywa-
THONK!
Or this:
Trashsus: Esp. Esp! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEsp!
Or if you prefer this:
XXX
[A/N: NEW SERIES I'LL BE STARTING. I'LL WAIT FOR YOUR OPINIONS IF I SHOULD CONTINUE THIS OR NOT. CYA.]
