The Wondering Mind

Beating Anxiety

You can't stop me, you know that!

I control you, you're every move.

Oh but my darling not anymore you don't...

You tried to cripple me make me so scared I'm immobile. 

That's what you want for me to be so riddled with "what ifs" and doubts I can do nothing.

I know you, I've dealt with you for years old friend yet you chose to underestimate me.

You want utter control, you want me down.

I found your weak spot you can do nothing.

You lie to me screaming about my insecurities my past anything to stop me from leaving.

That used to work not too long ago.

Breath hitches, stuttering until it stops, chest squeezing so tight my heart may stop.

Black outs and blurred vision and and mind spinning so fast I stumble to the ground.

You used to scare me 

You used to have me in your palm 

Once upon a time I could barely leave the house without fearing you

You've lost I told you long ago id fight tooth and nail with you 

You whispered to me I wouldn't survive you as you pinned me down 

I told you one day id win and leave you bruised on the floor.

I stood my ground that final day like stone against a raging flood 

I held that rope firm while you bucked and kicked on the other end 

I won... 

You can no longer touch me, you can't break me

This time I whispered "you won't survive me and you won't touch me again"

Dear anxiety you are no longer my problem to fight with.

That is the most releasing thing i've ever felt, to be released from the monster that's held me for so long I can finally breathe on my own.