i like the way you move

baguette

ollie wollie baguette

"AY YOU FOOKIN NONCE MAXY WAXY– THE FUCK ARE YOU PLAYING AT FAM" Ollie Wollie screams at the tv.

He's playing his favourite game in the entire world: fifa.

"NOTHING MATE, " Maxy Waxy yells back at him, "STOP HAVING A GO, YEAH??"

"GO SUCK YOUR MUM," Ollie wollie answers. This man takes his fifa seriously.

Suddenly, a voice is calling his name.

"Oliver darling sweetie honey boo boo pie sugar lovey wovey doo sweet-cheeks baggy waggy angel sweetheart sunshine precious dear?" Ollie Wollie's mum calls from downstairs.

"FOOK OFF MUM IM PLAYIN FEEFUH YOU FOOKING WHORE!!!"

"Oh, yes, of course. My apologies precious buttercup prince snookums pumpkin cutie patootie baby boy," she says and scoots off to go and clean Ollie Wollie's football carpet.

Ollie returns to his game. He then sighs and groans dramatically; Maxy Waxy likes when he does that.

"Sorry maxy waxy, mate; my bitch of a mum wants me," he rolls his shit stained orbs.

"Ah, alright lo- mate. Sound innit fam, yeah, " Maxy Waxy says sadly.

Maxy Waxy hates being apart from Ollie Wollie with his intoxicating diarrhoea skid orbs and strong scent of lynx africa mixed with sweaty boxers.

After Ollie Wollie turns off the game he loves with all of his heart, he makes his way across his football-themed room. Although, sadly, he was missing his signature football carpet.

Finally, after heading past all of the Manchester United shit in his room, he finds the staircase.

^(the room–so stylish)

Slowly, he creeps down.

He, of course, is walking like a dog on drugs down the stairs because he's quirky like that, you know?

With a final woof, he leaps down the stairs and heads to the kitchen to find the bitch-ass hoe that he calls mum.

What could she want him for?

It must be serious if she interrupted Ollie Wollie's fifa time...

✄╰U╯✄╰U╯✄╰U╯✄╰U╯✄╰U╯

A/N

hey 😍

FOOK OFF MUM IM PLAYING FEEFUH

hope you like it bc i spent like 20 minutes on it–such hard work and shit yk

ik this story is absolutely incredible and a work of art better than willy shakes pear. I'm just naturally gifted and talented

who's your favourite character??? 🤤

expect some shit in these A/Ns bc I'm full of it and will be going off about something

#bewhoyouare
#girlboss
#queen

thanks to that homiesexual Cows_InSpace for believing in me 💪🥶😢

and my husband 😍

bye my adoring fans x 😍👴