Percy didn't have many ordinary days in his life.
Today was no exception, it seemed.
He was walking down the beach, reveling in its beach-ness. The water was so wet, he could just feel it, since he was Poseidon's son.
The waves crashed down on the sand, getting more and more intense. It seemed unnatural, like it was storming but there was no storm.
Another wave crashed down as he watched, revealing a redhead, standing there.
Rachel Elizabeth Dare's eyes glazed over and glowed, and her mouth opened, preparing to spill out words in prophecy. Percy felt his heart sink in dread.
Before she could speak, another wave came, and dragged her back out to sea. No warnings today, bitches.
There was a flash of light, and then a big human grape appeared.
'I feel like this should seem weird,' Percy thought, 'but this all seems pretty normal ngl'
"Give me the power stone," the (kinda hot?) mystery man said.
"Wow, I'm bi now," said Percy.
"What?"
"Uhhhh - I'm buying the power stone?"
"What are you talking about?"
Percy just kinda shrugged
"Give me the power stone," Thanos demanded again
"Your name's Thanos?"
Thanos blushed. "N-no one's ever known my name before I tell them before"
Percy winked "Ya got the author to thank for that"
"What?"
"What?"
"What?"
"What?"
"...Gimme the power stone"
"Where's the power stone"
"You have it"
"No I don't"
"Yes you do"
"No I don't"
"Yes you do!!" Thanos said with tears of frustration. "You ate it earlier!"
Percy blinked. "Oh - why didn't you just say that?"
He reached down into his throat and pulled out his breakfast
(thas what she said)
He got the power stone from it & looked at Thanos
Thanos was sitting in the corner, tears brimming his eyes and sniffling pitifully
Percy went over to him. "Hey hey - don't cry, you big purple guy"
"I-I used to be blue," he said.
"Ok"
"But I like being purple more"
"Kk"
Percy held out the stone. "Here you go," he said.
Thanos took it, flicking off the chunks of breakfast juice, and smiled at Percy gratefully. "Thank you! Now I can destroy half the universe!!"
"Yay - wait what?"
"Uh — not /this/ universe,"
"Oh. That's fine then."
Thanos reluctantly stood up. "I must go now... Thank you for your assistance."
He made a portal and was about to step through. Percy grabbed his arm at the last minute & he stopped.
"Will...will I see you again?"
Thanos looked at him with wide eyes "You'd want to? Even tho I'm evil??"
Percy cupped the guy's face "You're more important to me than your universe," he said.
They got lost in each other's eyes
Then Thanos let the portal close. "I can stay for a little bit," he said shyly
Percy looked at his hand on Thanos's purple arm. "You have a muscle"
"Yes"
Thanos picked up Percy. Percy giggled
They got lost in each other's eyes
Thanos skipped away with Percy
Percy's mom fanned her face, teary-eyed with emotion. "Just like me and his father"
Thanos and Percy ate a bird. It tasted like fish.
"Yum," Percy said with a smile coated in bird blood
"I love cannibals," Thanos said
They got lost in each other's eyes
Thanos grinned and he taught Percy how to fly. He was like a lightning rod so Percy no lightning strike get hurty.
It was soo romantic
It was the best day of Perc'ys lif
Sally give Thanos blue cookies but they're purple
Thanos achieve his dreams of mass murdering half his universe, and snaps the gods out of existence so Percy's free
& they live happily ever after
And let this be a lesson to you
BINABASA MO ANG
Super serious not at all cursed or crack fic
FanfictionTo get in the Christmas spirit & if you're traumatized. I wouldn't have written this if my sister hadn't told me to I made myself laugh while writing but it's probably not very funny If you ask "why" at any point then my job is done
