loves me right..

chapter 1

y/n

I woke up with a beautiful look from the window. perfect view from the beautiful city Oulu. today we had a schedule again. I needed to get out of my bed. Today me and all the blind channel boys are meeting up in  the studio. everything's going to be a chaos since we won umk now. we are representing finland in Eurovision! to start that crazy journey with the band is amazing. Eurovision is one of the biggest contest for people in the music industry. we are flying to the Netherlands for this big big adventure. I still were thinking about my abusive ex. his name was kai. he did hurt me a lot when we were together. mentally and physically. I actually never told the boys about this whole situation. I got out of my bed. decided to wear this

I putted the coffee machine on. to make myself a big glass of latte. I really needed that right now.   i baked 2 eggs and added some spices. I sat down at the table. I heard a few notifications ring on my phone. I grabbed my phone to look. it was the group chat of me and bc. ''okay so Aleksi have some ideas for the performance and we are gonna discuss about it when we're at the studio'' was niko his text. I reacted with ''I'm excited what he has planned for us''. I finished my breakfast and decided to do my makeup. I chose for a big wing of eyeliner and a red lipstick. the eyeliner needed to be done a second Time because I messed up one eye. it happens always when I do my eyeliner. finally it looked good enough. since I had still enough time because it was a 20 minute walk and we need to be there around 13:00 and I looked at my phone. 11:30. great. just enough time to drink another coffee and watch my favourite series. I drank my coffee and looked at the time. 12:10, I decided that I would leave 10 minutes earlier so I could get a smoothie just around the corner of the studio. I grabbed my bag where I putted my phone, drum sticks and my card to pay. I saw that it was almost time to leave so I get my jacket and walked up to the door. I shut the door behind me. and the walk started. I walked through the big city streets of Oulu. i always enjoyed the walk to the studio. I was almost there until I felt someone touch my waist ''umh excuse u'' I said. ''oh nothing ur just a beautiful girl'' he said and started to touch my waist and at a moment my thighs. ''c-can u please not do this I'm not comfortable with it so can u let go please'' I asked calm. I got throwbacks of kai and I only started to panic m ore. ''oh no beautiful girl why should I '' he said while pulling me just a bit closer to him. I pulled him away and punched him. I started crying and panicking. he walked off and I runned into the studio. shit. everybody was there yet. and now I was here shaking and crying and my breathing was a bit out of control. ''Y/N WHAT IS GOING ON'' I heard niko yell. I lowered myself to the ground a long the door. ''good impression'' was my mind screaming. Aleksi walked over, he passed me a bottle of water. I slowly started to take some sips. ''y/n can u please explain to us what's going on I'm worried about u'' I heard Tommi say calmly. when I got calm again I started to explain everything. ''I was taking the walk to the studio, literally here in the street someone touched my waist and my thigh and p-pulled me closer to him'' I told the guys. I wasn't done yet. ''I pulled him and punched him and then he walked off but its that I have a bit of a trauma with touching me and a lot more things'' I told them. shit, of course they wanted to know my trauma now! ''can u maybe tell us the trauma if ur comfortable with it of course '' Joel asked. now I needed to try not to cry. I took a deep breath. my words were ''his name is kai, he was my boyfriend a long time ago. he was very abusive, mentally and physically. I am always scared, he did really horrible things to me.'' and now I took again a deep breath to not burst out in tears. ''y/n that's horrible for u, if u ever need to talk to someone we are here for u okay?'' I heard olli say. ''who the fuck should do this to u like look u are perfect'' Aleksi said. he looked with a face of guilt because he thought that I would be uncomfortable. I smiled at him and told him thank u. now after this drama we started.

aleksi

when y/n told us all of this my heart dropped. I mean look at her, her beautiful brown hair with green eyes.  her outfit. shit. she caught me staring at her, she chuckled. I turned away. ''but my plan for the performance was wait'' I said and grabbed my bag. I got out of a paper. '' so y/n and Tommi are playing drums, Tommi plays part 1,3,5 and y/n the others. Tommi's drum will be in the back of the front and y/n is gonna play at the left side.'' I said. ''AND WHERE DOES ME AND OLLI NEEDS TO STAND'' joonas yelled. we all laughed. ''u and olli will be standing in the front. when niko and Joel walk up u all are gonna take a few steps behind okay?'' I said. we all nodded. y/n smiles and says ''we're going to have so much fun together!'' we all smiled and said yes. I got lost in y/n her eyes again. when she noticed I turned my head, I was red. I pretended I needed to write something so nobody would see my head because I looked. down. my hair was falling into my face. when I stopped being red I turned my head to the rest of the people again.  ''no but seriously to start this journey with u all is really special for me and I will never but never forget it so thank u all and we're going to make this epic'' y/n said. ''y/n u are so fucking sweet thank u for wanting to join this crazy adventure'' Joel said. we all agreed. I saw that it was late again. ''so now we shall go home I guess'' I said. the boys agreed. I saw that y/n looked a bit anxious so I walked up to her. ''shall I walk with u to ur home so u don't need to be scared'' I asked her. she nodded. ''oh look Aleksi the gentleman'' I heard Joonas say. I only showed my middle finger to him. they all laughed. when the others left me and y/n did also. we started walking , we had this bit of a chat going on. until I felt that she walked closer to me. ''the same man'' y/n whispered. I putted my arm around her. now the smile on her face is big. she looked at me and giggled. the man walked past us but I gave him a very dirty look. ''don't u try to touch her again'' I said. now he was mad and walked away. y/n looked at me and said ''thank u Alex, thanks''. we both smiled at each other. ''always nobody has the right to treat u that way'' he said. we were at her home. ''are u going to eat at ur own home?'' she asked me. ''well I was planning to do that'' I answered. ''oh stop being so crazy come on I will cook for us.'' y/n said and chuckled. she grabbed my hand and walked with me into her home. ''go sit at the table I will make dinner'' y/n said. I asked if she needs help but she didn't need help. I walked over to her table when a kitten walks over to me. I started petting her and they started purring. when y/n walked over to the table. she saw me and her cat. '' oh I see that Cara and u are besties already'' y/n said. we both giggled. I got to sit at the table again. we started eating dinner. it was delicious. ''thank u for this dinner'' Aleksi said. ''oh no problem Alex'' y/n said. we were done with dinner when I wanted  to grab my jacket to go home. y/n stopped me. ''if u even want u can stay over for the night'' I heard her say. I laid my jacket down. we both walked over to the couch. we sat down, watched a movie. I saw that y/n almost fell asleep so I whispered ''shall we go to sleep?''. she nodded, we both got ready for bed. I laid myself in bed and so did y/n. she snuggled up to me and laid herself close to me, I wrapped my arms around her. I looked at her if she was okay with it and she was so it was time. goodnight y/n'' I said. ''goodnight Alex'' she said and she felt asleep. Her brown hair falling into her face. Now I could fall asleep.