this to be our last words - patrochilles

V

In the darkness of night, I had watched Achilles breathe. His chest rose and fell ever so slightly, his hair crumpled around his head. He looked just as beautiful in sleep as in consciousness. His lithe hands pressed close to his face.

I retreated to darkness. His face burned into my eyes. I had never been pious, but I was certain then Aphrodite had her eyes on us, even in the background. For my chest swelled at his every glance, and my hands helped themselves to his body.

We were older now, on this night of his sixteenth year. We didn't know how much time we had left on Pelion. And we were determined to stay.

I shifted. Achilles's eyes were wide. He watched me with careful gaze. He smiled.

"When we leave Pelion," Achilles whispers against my flesh. "Do you believe the world will accept my fame?" I shifted downward, so our faces were level. His hair brushed my nose. His eyes were wide, doe-like in the darkness. There was so much space in his eyes, so much to fill.

"The world will be the one to give you fame," I murmured back. "It is you who will decide to accept it or not." Achilles nodded at this. His hair slipped from his eyes, catching in his eyelashes. They were long and kissed his cheeks when I could not. "Do you wish for fame?"

"Yes," Achilles said. Every so often I had to remind myself: he is a Hero. A half-god. I could not partake in the childish pleasures of keeping him in my arms, all for myself. He belonged to the battles he would fight, the name he would make for himself. He belonged to history.

And I? I was nothing but an exiled prince. The greatest joy I had ever known was that of Achilles. He was my reason for breathing my breath. He was my reason for joy and hope.

I'd give up everything for him. I would gladly give my soul. He saved me that day in the palace, so I shall save him when he needs to. My love cannot be held tighter than I am holding now.

"But I wish more for you to be there," He whispered. I looked up then, surprise piercing my chest. Achilles lashes kissed his cheeks once more. "I fear that the world will accept my fame, but not my love for you."

I had stared at him then, in the gentle darkness of Chiron's cave. Moonlight streamed inside, it feathered on our faces.

"Achilles," I whispered, my voice pressing my throat closed. Tears welled in my eyes. I was determined not to cry. My fingers brushed his cheeks before he burrowed into my touch.

He grabbed my hand, holding it to his face.

"Patroclus," He whispered. "Please never leave me in darkness. Allow me to be with you, always. Allow me, please, to be with you in life."

I did not know what to say. My throat had closed up, tears threatening to spill now. Achilles's own eyes were watery as he pressed into my hand.

"Yes," I whispered brokenly. Achilles sighed, blinking as tears spilt over his eyes. And there his lashes stayed, sticky with tears to his face. My lips pressed there, under his eyes. He cupped my face, pulling me forward. Laughter murmured from his chest as I pressed another soft kiss to his eye.

"Patroclus, never leave me please."

"Of course," I whispered.

"Patroclus, my αδελφή ψυχή." Soulmate. Other half. I stifled a sob then, my arms circling Achilles. "They will learn," Achilles murmured. "They will learn to love our love. My fears will not hold us back."

I kissed him then, my lips flush against his. He deepened the kiss, opening his mouth in welcome. I drank him in, the taste of him on my tongue. He tasted of figs and fire smoke and the fish we had caught for dinner. He tasted faintly of salt, the sea never leaving his veins.

"Have I told you," Achilles mumbled, pulling back briefly. "Of why I adore you?" I looked at him then, my eyes searching his green.

"You haven't," I whispered against his lips. Achilles pressed a kiss to them before speaking.

"You are the most beautiful of them all. Prettier than all the gods and girls that are supposed to be. Never once have I doubted my place by your side. You have always led me right, with that intelligence and wit of yours." Achilles pressed his hand to my face as heat bloomed on my cheeks. His lips curled up in a hesitant smile. "You made me feel like not just a hero and prince. You made me feel like myself. You allowed me to be myself without the labels."

My hands cupped his face, salty tears on my tongue. "I would love you without the god in your veins. I would love you even if the world broke open and Tartarus dragged us down. I would find you there and hold your hand. We would make it out to Elysium, philtatos." Beloved.

Achilles choked, tears overflowing. I kissed him then, each salty tear until his face was dry and his breath even.

"Don't cry, Achilles," I murmured, pulling him closer to me. "I will be with you until we are no longer. I will love no one else in life. You are my other half. You are my lifeblood itself."

Achilles clung to me until dawn, our tears still drying on our lips, our grip desperate onto each other.

We both shall go nowhere, we decided. We both shall spend every moment in each other's grasp. For our love burned our bodies fierce. For we could not live without the other. My other half. He truly was.

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hey loves!! if u enjoyed and want me to write more make sure to lmk!!! I love writing about Patroclus and Achilles and I am DEF reading TSoA again soon,, until then love u all!! <3333

(YEAH AOT s4 PART 2!!!)