Diamond in the Mafia

Chapter 32

Deshaes POV

Getting those thoughts out of my head was the biggest relief I've ever felt. And the fact that my Gem just accepted me and everything that came with me? It's too much. I'd never thought that someone would care for me as much as she did. Yeah I've got my mum and A but she's different. And I think I want to finally admit what I feel for her.

Sitting up, I glanced at her, and watched her take slow breaths and smile in her sleep. I felt good to know that someone was there with you, you weren't alone with your demons. That feeling of being squashed in to a box, with no room to scream? I prayed that I would never feel it again as long as I was with her.

Tiptoeing to the balcony, I lit a match I'd grabbed from her desk and brought out a piece of paper from my pocket that I always carried around.

Tonight. You better come or there'll be consequences. Don't tell ANYONE.

A reminder, I used to tell myself, that we are not all good. That I was broken, disgusting, worthless even. I hid it, but it never left me.

But now I wanted to be set free. To be like a bird finally let out from its cages. To live a life where I was loved and not hated by myself.

Slowly, I brought the match to the paper. 'One touch and it's done' I told myself. Remembering everything he'd done, I pushed them together and watched the flames dance and my freed soul with them.

"Shae?" A groggy voice called from inside the room. And I smiled.

"Go back to sleep love," I called back chuckling. I entered the room and slid back into the bed. An arm automatically wrapped around my waist and my heart swelled with happiness. One last thought entered ,y mind before I finally drifted off.

I've done it mum, I found the light.

The next morning was filled with utter chaos. Not any different than it normally is then. So many people came to welcome Gem back and I had King side-eyeing me the whole breakfast since his daughter was back safe and sound now.

After withstanding almost half an hour of just sitting there, I stood up and motioned for A to leave Sapphire for just onesecond and come outside with me.

"What's up man? I need to get back to Sapph."

"Bro you've been with her for like thirty hours straight! The hell?"

"Alright alright fair enough but what did you need?"

Taking a deep breath I told my brother, my ride or die everything. And I don't mean story time type shit, I'm talking but the whole life story.

"...Damn bro. That's peak." I stared at him blankly and waited for him to clock. "Nah I mean.. for real I'm glad that son of a bitch is dead and mama is such a badass. And you may not think it but you're strong as hell man. Like all them years you were surviving? I might not say it often but I love you man." Then we hugged. And it felt renewed like it was a whole new chapter of life.

We pulled apart and there were tears in both our eyes which neither one of us wanted to admit. Slapping my back, A nodded then walked away drying his eyes and muttering some random shit. "Damn didn't know I could cry like that. Fuck, the tears are coming back and I can't do shit. Oh my gosh where's Sapph? Where's Sapph?"

Smiling, I got my phone out and was ready to do the next thing for my new beginning. Suddenly mum stated calling me.

"Hey mummy,"

"Hi baby...you okay?"

"Yeah mum I'm good...look I need to tell you something but it'll be better face to face."

"Well go on then."

Confused, I looked around and didn't see nothing. 'Mum-" She ended the gotdamn call on me.

"Boo." Screaming a bit, I turned to see mum standing there with a mischievous smirk in her face. "Got you there didn't I?" She smiled and I laughed a bit at the joke, even though it weren't that funny. Seeing her like this was the reason I never wanted to tell her, but she deserved to know why her son got so...done with life.

"Mum...there something thing I gotta tell you,"

And I took another deep breath an said it all. With every word I said I could practically see her heart breaking more and more. Which in turn, broke my own. Finally, I finished and I couldn't look her in the eyes.

"D baby look at me. None of that was your fault. None of it. My only regret was that I wasn't so foolish and saved you earlier." She said while tears began to make their way down her face.

"Mum you were and are the best mother I could have ever been blessed with. How you did it? I don't know. But what I do know is that nothing was your fault either. So I guess none of us are to blame?"

Chuckling through her tears she answered me, "Yeah I guess so."

Engulfing her in one of the biggest hugs, was so calming that it was just us, two survivors , together. It used to be that we were alone in this together, but now we're side by side and moving on forever.

Once mum had gone inside to greet everyone, I sat down in the grass ,alone, and just evaluated everything that had happened.

Then someone came and sat beside me, resting their head on my shoulder. It was like she could read my mind. Whenever I needed her, she was there.

Turning to face her, I looked into her eyes in content. Rolling her eyes, she grabbed the back of my neck and kissed me like the world was ending. Pulling away breathless, she asked me a question I wouldn't have known how to answer some time ago.

"What are we, Shae?" Grinning I answered with confidence.

"Whatever we want to be."

Guys this was the last chapter😭

There's an epilogue left but I really am shocked and sad this I've basically finished this book. Thank you to everyone who stuck with it and motivated me to go on. Love you guys.