Behind Closed Doors

Chapter 14

Lana's POV:

What a significant turn of events Lana thought to herself as she made her way to meet Dr Hanover for the scheduled Lobotomy she was due to perform. She should be feeling anxious.. uneasy, but how could she when the only thing on her mind was the wonderful kiss she shared with Mildred? It was rather difficult to hide the smile that had crept onto her face as her fingers delicately ghosted over her lips.

The intensity of the kiss still lingered and if she closed her eyes long enough it almost felt as though Mildred was still kissing her. It was different to the first kiss they'd shared, the main difference being the outcome of course. Mildred hadn't reacted with disgust and regret this time round, instead she smiled and upon closer observation she even seemed somewhat shy which under different circumstances wasn't a word Lana would associate with the older woman. But the way she nervously nibbled on her lower lip as a light shade of crimson painted the apples of her cheeks was rather adorable.

Now, how was Lana supposed to focus on a lobotomy when Mildred was all she could think about?

"Ah Miss Winters there you are!" Dr Hanover addressed her as she stepped into the surgical room. Everyone was already dressed in the appropriate attire for a surgical procedure and she could physically feel the colour drain from her face, a gigantic knot settling in the pit of her stomach as she lay eyes on the sedated patient in the middle of the room. Breathing in deeply she accepted the surgical gown handed to her by Huck who had the same uneasy look on his face as before but managed to muster a polite smile.

Then, by some miracle that almost made Lana weep with joy, Dr Hanover announced; "I have decided that today you're just going to observe Nurse Bucket as she does the procedure. It wasn't fair to throw you straight into the deep end and expect you to swim. But watch and learn because you will be performing one very soon." All the tension that Lana held on her shoulders, slowly melted away and she tried not to look or sound too relieved when she spoke.

"Of course Dr Hanover." Lana moved closer to the patient as the doctor picked up an instrument and handed it to Nurse Bucket.

"Nurse Ratched," Lana followed Hanover's gaze across the room, her face instantly lighting up the moment she laid eyes on the older woman. "Glad you could finally grace us with your presence." He added, a rather familiar kind of disdain to his voice.

"I was tending to a patient," Mildred stated matter of factly, her gaze briefly meeting Lana's, and instead of her usual firm demeanour and scornful glances there was something much more sincere in the way she regarded the younger brunette; a subtle smile tugging at her lips accompanied by the delicate rosy tint to her cheeks as she quickly averted her gaze.

Suddenly, claiming everyone's attention Dr Hanover spoke. "Ok Nurse Bucket, whenever you're ready."

♡ ♡ ♡

The lobotomy was just as difficult for Lana to watch as before, even more so now seen as she was stood only a foot away from the patient and she had no other choice but to watch as Dr Hanover walked Nurse Bucket through the intricate procedure.

The older nurse seemed as calm as a cucumber, not a tremor in sight as she adhered to every one of Hanover's requests, and now it became clear that all she cared about was impressing the male doctor. Funnily enough, Mildred must have been thinking the same thing as her gaze met Lana's and they shared an equally amused albeit irritated look.

Once it was over Dr Hanover thanked everyone for their time, and whilst Huck and another nurse Lana hadn't been acquainted with wheeled the patient to one of the recovery rooms, Hanover coincidentally instructed Mildred and Lana to stay behind and clean up as though he knew the two women wanted to be alone together; of course if he knew why the outcome would be a lot more severe.

An awkward yet comfortable silence settled over the room as the two women busied themselves occasionally stealing glances at one another when the other wasn't looking; it was rather sweet.

"So.." Mildred's voice pierced the silence, gaze kept firmly on the metal instrument in her hand as she cleaned it, prolonging the action so she could have a little more time with the brunette.

"So.." Lana repeated, a gentle smile creeping onto her face as her gaze lingered on the older woman.

Mildred's voice was quiet when she spoke next, gone was her usual imperious, commanding quality, replaced by a slightly reserved tone; almost unrecognisable. "I'm not a.." she trailed off unable to say the word just like last time, it almost sounded rehearsed as though she was trying to convince herself rather than Lana.

"A lesbian?" Lana finished for her, showing her that it wasn't a taboo word to say, which made Mildred's head snap up, eyes widening in alarm. The brunette felt sorry for her, she of all people knew what it was like to hide your true identity, the fear of other people's opinions being far too great a risk to acknowledge who you really were. Luckily for Lana, the people who really knew her loved her regardless, and the people who didn't.. didn't matter. Her parents had been very supportive in that aspect of her life before passing.

There's a saying, "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." Lana had tried to live by that ever since she'd discovered she preferred the company of other women which was pretty early on in her teenage years.

"It's ok," The brunette shrugged nonchalantly. "I've never liked labels. You're just.. Mildred.. and that's more than enough." She added, a sincere smile tugging at her lips. She wanted her to know that it really was ok, her sexuality wasn't a big deal and Lana wasn't about to go shouting from the rooftops what had happened between the two of them; that was their business.

When Mildred caught her gaze again, there was a heartfelt look etched into her sharp features, passing a silent thank you to the younger woman. There was a moment between the two as they gazed at one another, their tasks long forgotten. Lana wanted to kiss her again, so badly, but she restrained herself, not wanting to make the older woman feel uncomfortable and the room they were in wasn't exactly private.

"Would you maybe.." Mildred bit down on her lower lip nervously, diverting her gaze and Lana thought it was the most adorable thing she'd ever seen, and when the older woman returned her gaze there was a newfound confidence glimmering in her dark eyes. "Like to grab a drink after work? I know this quaint little bar not too far from here."

Lana had to physically hold back the excitement that bubbled up inside of her, a pearly white grin spreading across her face as she slowly nodded her head. "I would like that very much."

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Hi guys, it's been a while I know. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and as always your feedback is much appreciated!
~T ♡~