Dear diary,
I am sure you would be thinking why out here in public, because people usually think that the life of a doctor is a path of roses. It is everything but that. And second because i dont have many friends to share my everyday rant.
I am naturally a very shy and introvert person, and that puts me on the back seat of making friends. Second i somehow always land up with wrong people who use my innocence to there advantage. Yeah to be honest i feel very dumb to not understand the inner politics and the tricks and tactics. I will tell you all of that in good time.
So let me give you a little flash back from friday.
That day as usual i went early to obg dept. yeah i am posted in obg dept for 2months. And because people had already warned me against the dept that it is toxic, so i am extra careful.
So Friday, i was feeling feverish, pukish, throat pain was there and i was dizzy also. That day i had night duty and at the end moment i dint find any replacement. Oh yeah so how the night duty thing goes, is that there will be 4 people, 2 has to be in labor room and 2 in wards. And if you are deciding to not come on that day then you have to find your replacement or else you will be marked absent and everyone else as well. And sat, sun was a holiday so i couldnt find a replacement, secondly everyone was falling sick.
That day, by afternoon, my temperature reached 101. I needed cold tepid sponging and i couldnt move also. Even after 2 blankets and one sweater i was still feeling cold. I had taken 3 dolo but still the fever was not coming down. But because i dint have much option i somehow gathered all my courage and strength to go and report for night duty. I thought i will inform my pgs so that out of humanity they will equally divide the work. I wasn't expecting them to let me go because thats how they are and i knew that very well. But after 5 mints of informing my pg gave me all the work. She told and i quote
"Yeah i am also not well, now do the work."
From vital monitoring in wards and postop, to drip monitoring, to after medication monitoring, preparing pac (which ot was on wed, and there was 5 more days to do that work), she kept giving me work. And rest 3 interns were free. By the time I finished the work I thought i will die. I ate food and took medicines and passed out. My cointerns understood she is targeting. And may be she felt bad about that so next day she personally texted me in the morning the work list. I couldnt even take my medication. After I finished my work i went back to give attendance but they were busy gossiping. They saw me and ignored while i was standing holding the wall. Thats how caring my pgs are.
So now coming back to today. Today at dot 9 my unit pg called me to ask whether i am coming or not. They wanted to torture me today but i was very sick, it was difficult to walk also, i was dizzy, i was pukish, i couldnt eat also (at 6 i ate my first food) so i couldnt go. They would be waiting for tomorrow. May God bless me. Because tomorrow they are going to kill me with work.
And let me tell you the cherry on cake, we dont get money! Yep zero!!! But we want to finish our internship as soon as we can so they scare us with attendance.
Honestly the highlight of my day is when i reach my room and lie down on my bed or talk to my friends. And now so many of my friends and pgs are testing positive. So much that in one dept only 2 pgs are left to be tested and we have got notifications to not test ourselves or else they would have to close the dept. and even if we test positive we have to go or else we wont get attendance. Honestly i am not here to tell how bad our condition is. I am just ranting because i feel bad!
Anyway, see you tomorrow, have to go for covid meeting.
Xoxo,
Love
