Unloving Lukas

Simula

Love can be the most powerful feeling we could ever feel.
It changes everything about us.
No matter how cold, heartless or care less you are, when you fell in love everything changes.

Simula sa unang mga taon na pinag mamasdan ko siya ng hindi niya man lang alam, hanggang sa mga taon na sinubukan kong simulan na lapitan siya. Hindi na siguro kayang baguhin ng panahon kung ano ang nararamdaman ko para sa kanya.

"Lukas, staring is rude."
Lori said with all the sarcasm she could ever throw at my face.

"Get a life Lors!" I sipped on my drink.

"Wow! Kung ako sayo sabihin mo na 'yang nararamdam mo kasi baka maunahan kana naman."

Tres maybe entertaining boys. But she never had boyfriends though she can always have one if she wanted.

"She's not doing boyfriends and you know that." I said confidently.

"And why is that kaya Lukas? Gosh! Mag-isip ka nga. Nakakaloka kayong dalawa sa totoo lang."

Diyan ako hindi sigurado.
She has the hots for Miko I can feel that. I know one when I saw one.
There are times that it felt like she likes me and she wanted to throw herself to me. But at the same time when she finally collected herself? She'll go away, far away from me if possible.
It's like she's teasing you to fall but then when you fall, she'll leave. Maiiwan kang mag-isa at nag tatanong kung saan ka nag kamali.
Gaya ng nangyari sa mga kakilala ko sa ibang course na hanggang ngayon hindi pa din maka move on sa kanya.
Babe, what's your deal, huh?

"Lukas! Quit staring."

Fucker.

"Shut up Aki."

"Dude! Hindi mo kayang tunawin sa mga tingin mo 'yan. Hindi mo 'yan kayang apektuhan ng mga pasulyap-sulyap mo lang. Alam mo 'yan. Napaka sungit ng babaeng 'yan."

"Alam mo naman kung bakit siya masungit sayo, fucker!"

"Wow! Oh Bakit sweet ba 'yan sayo? Kulang na lang nga mag patayan kayo nyan diba? At isa pa hindi ka pasok sa standard niyan. Remember?"

"Gago."

"Look at her. Hindi din naman party girl ang type mo, pero bakit mukhang iniba lahat ni Tres ang standards mo Lukas? Hindi din naman ikaw ang nasa standard niya bilang boyfriend. Right?"

I looked at Aki once more. Hindi ko alam kung bakit kailangan niyang ulit-ulitin yung bagay na 'yun.
Tres was once asked by friends about having standards for boyfriends, and she said something that is literally not me.
"I might need someone I can have fun with."
Fun.
Hindi ako 'yun.
Hindi ako masayang kasama for sure, I'll get her bored definitely.
And that realization really sucks!

"You'll never get the chance you want from Lori, hanggat nandito ako. Gago."

Tumawa lamang ito ng malakas na parang nang bubuska talaga ng maigi.

Well, Yeah he is right.
We always have the standards when it comes to people that we want in our lives.
But how can you resist that little tease?
The way she dance, talk, smile, laugh. Her little attitude and tantrums. Her ways of touching people lives with her words.
Even the way she blushes because of other men? I still want her that way.
And that is insane.

"Bored?"

I am outside the bar right right now and trying to compose myself from the thoughts when an unfamiliar face popped in front of me.
I tried to recognize her but I just couldn't.
Hindi ko siya kilala.
So I just nod.

She smiled and stayed beside me silently.
Maybe she's bored too?

"Ngayon mo lang ako napansin, kailangan pa pala kitang lapitan talaga."