A year passed, and it was so terrible to say you never saw Nishimura Riki again. You looked around as much as you could for those same pink candies, and once, you thought you'd found it.
They were the same size you remembered them as and the wrappers were that same shiny pink color. When you opened it up, it was the same smooth caramel, but when you placed it in your mouth, it just tasted like a regular caramel candy.
You'd spent a dollar fifty on a box of them, but you threw the entire thing away. Your mom was upset when she learned of what you'd done to the candies, but you weren't bothered.
Sometimes, you would search out the little clearing you'd met him in. You remembered the wandering to the clearing being much shorter, but the one time you lost yourself again, it took at least two hours to and from.
That one time, you spent as much time there as you could. You watched the sky dim and the stars come out like the first time. You thought about waiting to see if he would come; you thought about trying to find your way to his house.
In the end, you decided to lose yourself in candy land. You wandered the forest under the moonlight until you stumbled back into your town at nearly midnight. You didn't go back after that.
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You were never able to forget those two nights you spent with him. You found yourself sometimes wandering the edge of the forest just for the feel of it.
You found yourself forcing yourself to move on. It wasn't too much to move on. You made yourself remember that you barely ever knew him.
Even so, whispers in your mind reminded you of the sugar sweet butterflies that had fluttered in your heart when you were with him. You couldn't forget how peaceful he looked when he was sleeping or the gumdrop taste of his lips; you couldn't forget the gentle weight of his head laying on yours while you were riding the train.
It was all a nostalgic sort of feeling. Many times, those two days felt like a dream. You thought that maybe it hadn't happened.
Your journal page with the candy wrapper taped into it told you otherwise. Sometimes, you still wrote in your journal. After the early morning you'd gotten back, you used to write about him almost every day for some time, but it soon slowed to sometimes once a month.
When you found yourself slowly falling for someone new, you found yourself writing in your journal every night. You wrote entries like they were letters to Riki. You told him about what was happening, and you made promises of never forgetting.
What hurt the most was when one day, you woke up and you realized you'd forgotten the sound of his laugh. You'd forgotten the soft low sound that made you feel like your heart was a melting marshmallow.
Then, you almost forgot the sound of his voice. The only thing that kept you holding onto that sound was what he'd said softly to you when he'd pulled away from the kiss.
Let's get lost in candy land.
That sentence murmured softly in the dark was always buried somewhere in your mind, and never would you lose it.
So after you found yourself forgetting the gumdrop taste of his lips and the bubblegum lavender scent of his breath, that was the one thing you would never forget.
One day, you lost your memory of his warmth. You couldn't forget what had happened, and you couldn't forget that teasing glint to his eyes, but it felt like everything that could be forgotten was.
You sometimes wanted to get lost in the forest again. You wanted to get lost in candy land, even if it was on your own.
You continued with your life and you found a new warmth in your someone new, but nothing ever came to match that breath of fresh air you'd gotten when you were with Riki.
You let yourself freely love and you let yourself move on. You let yourself close your eyes and see someone else's face in the reflection of your mind.
Even so, you could always remember the soft unsure tenderness of Riki's voice. Sweet, and hesitant.
Then..Let's get lost in candy land.
