𝖋𝖚𝖈𝖐 𝖓𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖏𝖆𝖈𝖔𝖇𝖘 • 𝖊𝖚𝖕𝖍𝖔𝖗𝖎𝖆 𝖎𝖒𝖆𝖌𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖘 ❦

i wish that were me - rue bennett

summary: being rue bennett's best friend meant that you had to support her through all her ups and downs and when it came to feelings, it was time to shove those away. you've loved rue since the 6th grade, and seeing her be with jules especially when you third wheeled them a lot hurt so much. when talking to fez and lexi you tell them how you really feel about rue and the situation.

TW: LANGUAGE, DRUG MENTION

It was a couple days after new years and the incident, so many things had gone down, but the main thing you were focused on was rue. jules and rue were back together which only meant 1 thing.. you were the third wheel again.

just. fucking. great.

but today you got lucky, fezco and lexi were tagging along which meant you weren't completely alone. they ended up wanting to see a movie but lexi was a bit late so you guys ended up missing it. jules then decided to take you guys to some bridge thing, you didn't know what it was, and you didn't honestly care. you just kept your eyes on rue and jules, the way they held hands, and laughed and giggled while skipping made your blood boil. you had always been in love with rue and you had always been there for rue, and it made you so furious that instead of going to you she went back to the person that left her. you were glad she was happy but for fucks sake did jules have to be so needy?

"y/n?" lexi interrupted your thoughts, you hummed. "yeah, what?" you asked. "I just wanted to make sure you were alright," lexi smiled. you wanted nothing more than to just tell the truth and let loose.

"oh yeah yeah, i'm fine lex.." you responded giving the biggest fake smile. you looked back over at jules and rue to see them sharing a kiss, your eyes welled up and you crossed your arms over your chest.

you just didn't understand why that couldn't be you. you felt broken, empty, rue was all you had and she couldn't even pay attention to you for 5 seconds no matter what was happening to you.

"um, i think i left my phone in the car, i'll be right back." you said rushing off into the small patch of woods. the second you were out of lexi and fezco's sight the tears were streaming down your face.

fuck it. yeah, you were jealous. you had every right to be though, rue had never paid attention to you, you were always there for her but it could never be the other way around, all you wanted to do was help her but she wouldn't let you.

you found a rock and sat down on it wiping your eyes with your sleeves. you had no idea what it was about jules that you didn't have but it just made you so furious, it wasn't fair to jules honestly, but she took rue from you.

"ayo y/n, you good?" fezco asked from behind you. you stood up quickly and wiped your eyes again. "oh yeah for sure, i just got some pollen in my eye," you lied trying to hide the tear stains on your face.

"y/n.. please don't fucking lie to me." lexi said, "can you just tell us what's wrong so we can try to fix it."

"jesus fucking christ lexi, nothing is wrong with me! can you literally just fuck off!?" you yelled, you couldn't hold back the feelings anymore, but you also couldn't let any out.

"y/n i just wanna help you, can you just tell me what the fuck is wrong?" she said walking towards you a bit.

"i am in love with rue! i have been since the fucking 6th grade but she's been too blinded and occupied with jules to fucking notice! all i ever wanted was to be there for her, she's the only person i have! and when she overdosed last year i though i fucking lost her for good!" you yelled furiously, not even caring if anyone miles away could hear.

"even when i was there for her and visited her in the hospital she couldn't even fucking pay attention to me for a second, and then jules had to waltz the fuck in and take her away! rue means everything to me and i'll be fucking damned if some 'space bitch' thinks she can come in and take her away from me." you gasped for air trembling as waterfalls came down your cheeks.

"fuck!" you screamed as you kicked a tree, you leaned you head against it and tried to breathe.

'why can't she just love me back?'

THE EUPHORIA IMAGINES ARE FINALLY HERE LADIES, GENTLEMEN, AND NON-BINARY BABES!!!! STAY TUNED THERE ARE WAY MORE TO COME!!!!!