The Doctor Will See You Now

Her

She was a teenage girl growing up in a prison. Not in the literal sense of the word, but it was just as horrible. She was trapped in a world full of her parent's ideals. Being pushed under, struggling to surface and hold herself above the expectations. Everything that was important to her was pushed aside, their place taken by the things her father said were of utmost importance. Her love of sport and music were long forgotten since she was being pushed to be academic. Her piano sat gathering dust and she had hidden her notebook where she wrote all of her songs. Her passions were non-existent, extinguished to make room for her family's passions. The ones they thought would be appropriate and get her far. They thought it was in her best interest that she pursued what they wanted. But they were wrong.

Her father had a brilliant mind and he had worked with ease to achieve it. He was intelligent and could solve any problem that was thrown at him. The thing was, he expected that of his daughter. He expected that she become as brilliant as he, but she wasn't, or at least she didn't think so. She wasn't her father. She was her own person with her own interests and having all of this suppressed by a person who barely knew who she was, was heartbreaking. She didn't want to follow in his footsteps but wasn't given a choice. Her future had always been thoroughly planned out for her by her parents and even her grandparents. She was the oldest child and her younger sibling had never been pressured the way she was. As the oldest she had the responsibility to uphold her father's ideals.

This girl's life was one big list of what she could and couldn't do. She was sick of being told who she had to be friends with and who to stay away from. The people she wanted to spend time with weren't worthy of her parents. The people that gave her something to laugh and smile about weren't good enough and this frustrated her to no end. She distanced herself from the people she once called friends and being alone was the next best thing. She was sure people never noticed her so it didn't matter. She was invisible and it was better that way.

Fear was supposed to be a mental protection against all that is dangerous, although this was not the case for this trapped, teenage daughter. For her fear was of disappointing her parents and family. She had to be careful what she said or did around them in case they saw something they didn't approve of. It is this fear that kept her guarded and she was the one who would decide what people saw and knew about her. She hid because she was afraid that everyone around her would be disappointed in the person she was and wanted to be.

So that leaves the question, who did she want to be? The answer is quite simple. She wanted to be herself, able to make her own decisions as well as face her own mistakes. She wanted to be able to hold her head up and be proud of the person she made of herself knowing that she did the best she could and no one would ever ask for any more. She knew who she was but no one else did. It was her secret, a silly little secret that she would take to her grave. All she wanted was something she would never get. Freedom.

Freedom.

Freedom.

Freedom.