𝐏𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐀'𝐒 𝐁𝐎𝐗! heroes of olympus²

i. in her dreams

chapter one!
001. in her dreams

claire.

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    SIX MONTHS.

    He had been missing for six months.

    From December to June. She had counted each moment▬each second, each hour, each day, each week and each month. She had counted each breath she took ... worrying, begging, praying to every god she knew to give her a sign, to help her find him, to get him back home. She begged to hear his voice, to remember his laughter, to remember to feel of his arms around her and the smell of the ocean air▬a sweet, salty scent that calmed her and helped her drift off to sleep at late night campfire singalongs, snuggled close up to him with her marshmallow stolen and stuck onto the end of his stick instead. To hear him whisper her name, coaxing her awake when it was time to head back to their cabins. To chuckle as he swung her arm back and forth, walking ridiculously back up to the hill and she would have to rush after him to keep up▬before he'd tackle her around into a bear hug right in front of her cabin, and he'd kiss her goodnight, and Claire would kiss him again because he was just so ridiculous ... and she'd walk to her door, blushing and beaming▬for once never happier in her life than to have him with her, alive and at her side ... to then wave back and already find him making a face as he walked away ...

    And Claire would forget which moments were real, and which moments she had started to dream.

    Without him, she felt lost. After everything they had been through, he was had become something solid▬something so real in this life that she was so sure she would never lose. Which had been a naive fantasy. But she had believed it so thoroughly, because he made it seem so easy. He survived everything. He made it through every fight and each remarkable victory. He made it back with that stupid grin on his face and she'd run into his arms, or she'd punch his shoulder, or kiss the grin right off his lips. Percy Jackson was Claire Moore's rock, her stability▬her link to life when she forgot she was still apart of it. He was her best friend, and he was her partner in battle. He had been her hope and her motivation for survival. He brought her back out of the depths of the deep end and taught her how to swim to keep herself afloat. When everyone left Claire Moore, he promised her he never would.

    And then he was taken from her. Ripped from her, and it left her breathless▬it left her aching and in pain; lost and alone and in desperation. She was still fighting to keep herself afloat; to keep her head above the surface, but no matter what she did, no matter how hard she tried▬how hard she battled, and argued, and cursed the entire heavens, no one would allow her to swim deeper to pull him back up, as well.

    Six months she had to wait ... knowing he was out there. Knowing that if she left, she could find him. Knowing that if she found her way, she could see him again. But she had to wait. She had to be patient. She had to count her breaths, count the nights she slept in his sweaters and cried underneath the covers of her bed, count the days she sat at the lake's edge, desperate to know whether he heard her whispers of his name ... terrified that when the day finally came that she'd see him again, he would not remember her at all.

    And Claire knew that would shatter her.

    She would not stop staring over the edge of the boat. The entire trip to Camp Jupiter, she had not moved. Her heart was pounding outside of her chest; not quite close enough for her to reach out for it and force it back into its place. 

    No one had been courageous enough to talk to her, either. They had left her alone, terrified and pale for the moment they arrived. She knew some had glanced over, just to check if she hadn't leapt off to make the journey quicker▬she knew Annabeth was worried about her. She knew Cain could sense exactly what she was feeling, and told Annabeth everything he felt. She knew Jason was eyeing her cautiously. She knew Savreen was trying very hard not to walk up to her. She knew Piper had told the daughter of Harmonia to let her be and she knew Leo Valdez was trying to be as quick as he could to get them where they needed to go.