spiral • elliot fanfic

1 • narcotics anonymous

"i am so proud of each and every one of you for how far you have come. achieving full sobriety isn't an easy thing. remember that..." the woman on the podium speaks to us all. my leg bounces up and down as i pick the skin around my fingernails.

i wanna leave this place so badly...end the meeting. end the meeting. end the meeting.

sorry, those were my thoughts. quite intrusive, don't you agree?

"that's all for today." those four words were all i needed before i was halfway out the door. these meetings weren't something i enjoyed attending, they were more of a chore. i slide my phone out of my pocket, dialing my father's number.

"hello?"

"yeah...i-uh, i'm done with the meeting. can you come pick me up?" my words fight to come out. he gives me a simple 'okay' before hanging up. as i wait for my dad to arrive, i feel a presence behind me. turning around, i'm face to face with my sponsor, jemma.

she spins a shiny chip around in her hands. jemma takes my hand in hers before placing the chip down. "congrats." was all she said before walking to converse with somebody else. looking down i see a '1-year' sobriety chip. i know that i should feel proud, accomplished, joyous even...but i don't. i could show you the box i have filled up with more chips than i can remember.

"one year? has it been that long already? i'm proud of you n/n." a familiar raspy voice speaks as she walks towards me with open arms.

embracing her hug, i respond. "i try rue...i really do. y'know i didn't expect to see you of all people at a narcotics anonymous meeting on new year's eve."

"clean mind, clean slate. am i right?"

liar. liar. liar. i know you're still doing drugs rue. oh, how i wish i could join you. i wanna join. i wanna join. i wanna join. fuck! i sound like a whiney little kid. these damn voices will be the death of me...

"hello?" rue snaps her fingers in front of my face, drawing me back to reality. "i was asking if you would like to join me at the new year's party tonight."

"what par-" i go to ask her before my dad pulls around the corner. "just uh- text me the info. i'll be there." is the last thing i say to rue before getting in the car.

my dad throws a quick smile at rue before driving off. "i see you and rue are talking to each other again. how was you meeting?" i hold up the chip that jemma gave me.

"365 days already...can you believe it?" i smile at him, it may have been one of the first genuine ones we've had in a while.

"i'm so proud of you kiddo! you really don't understand how happy this makes me. how about this, we can go to that nice movie that you and rue used to love? we can buy a huge bucket of popcorn and all of that. what do ya say? we on for tonight?"

he seems so excited...

"i really wish i could dad but rue invited me to this new years party and i have to go shopping before. how about tomorrow?" his expression slightly falls at my words but he gives me a bright reassuring smile.

"sounds great kiddo. do you want me to drop you off at maddy's house?" i nod and smile at him.

─────•~❉᯽❉~•─────

"hey bitch!" maddy exclaims as she pulls me into a hug. i walk into her house, making my way towards her room.

"look what the cat dragged in!" cassie sequels, pausing from her makeup. i throw my arms up with a smile.

i plop down on maddy's bed, scrolling through my insta feed. my eyes immediately dart to the new text message i got from rue. she had sent me the party information. i didn't think she'd even remember

"so y/n, do you know what you're wearing tonight?" bb questions, taking a hit from her vape.

i shrug. "i was planning on stealing something from maddy."

haha. copycat. copycat. copycat. you're trying so hard to be like her; it's pathetic.

i mentally roll my eyes as i hear the voices speak in my mind. pushing myself off the bed, i rummage through maddy's closet. something black and shiny catches my eye. i pull it out, only to reveal a dazzling black jumpsuit with a chest cutout.

"i'm stealing this maddy." i announce to her. she simply shrugs, going back to what she was doing. i sit down at the vanity and start doing my makeup.

─────•~❉᯽❉~•─────

as i undress, the sound of a small item hitting the floor is heard. i assume the other girls didn't notice as they were to busy trying on their outfits. picking it up, i realize that it's my sobriety chip.

"oh my gosh- i completely forgot to tell you guys..." i smile, slowly turning around. that sentence starter already has them on their toes. "i'm one year sober today!" i exclaim causing all their mouths to hang open with shock.

"bitch! you're actually about to make me cry." maddy fans her eyes in hopes to prevent ruining her makeup. eventually stopping, she pulls me into a tight hug; kat, bb, and cassie join us.

"aww i love you guys so much, now let's get ready! we have a party to get to." i mumble in the hug. kat hands maddy a tissue before taking one for herself. the two of them pat the tissue just above their waterline, catching the tears just as they're about to fall.

i pull on the jumpsuit before attempting to flag down somebody to help zip me up.

maddy walks over to me with some black satin platform heels. around the band had gems attached. "put these on, they'll match perfectly." just as i slide the shoes on, all the girls are done getting dolled up. we all grab out phones from the charger and head out of the door.

"y/n, heads." cassie shouts, tossing the car keys at me. i catch them, almost dropping my phone in the process. getting into the drivers seat, i put the keys in and briefly text my dad.

dad🤍

y/n
hey, i'm just texting to let you
know that the girls and i are
leaving for the party now.
if you need me, you have my
number! i love you
delivered 8:26 p.m.

"who's ready to party!" bb shouts, causing all the girls to cheer in agreement. i hand maddy the aux since she's in the passenger's seat. pushing my foot down on the gas pedal, we're off into the night...