Perception

The Way of thinking

I just wanna say three small real stories of the people I know in my neighborhood.

1. Sravya-  A Childhood friend
Ms. PERFECT is the correct word to describe her. She is always punctual to classes, disciplined, friendly. She always study, never bunks classes, topper of the class. She always thought of what others are thinking about her. She wants to be great/top position in thier thoughts. So she always fights for marks/ranks/placements. The day comes, she sits in a interview, she succeeds in interview also. But she is not happy guess why?
She got package of 3.6 lpa only and some of her friends got 7lpa package. She thought that salary is not enough if she moves to another city in future.
Whenever her relatives or friends came home to congratulate also, she is bit insecure about her salary and always worry about that. Some times she is having suicidal thoughts. She keeps applying for companies that offering higher package but till now she didn't get any.

2. Indu- my college friend
She is very friendly and somewhat crazy girl. I couldn't say that she tops the class but she always get minimum of 85%. She always fond of movies. She bunks classes and goes to movies with her girl gang or with her boyfriend (our classmate only). Yes, she loves someone but married to other due to family pressure during second half of our bachelor's degree.
But unfortunately her husband left her when he got a foreign Job offer. So she concentrates on her studies and get a job too. Whenever I asked her , " hey how are u? Are u fine?" She replies like this, " yup, I'm almost in the verge of achieving happiness, I'm trying hard for that". She shocked me with her reply. She is trying to remove all that sad stains from her pure heart.

3. Bharatamma- known Grandmother

Yes, she has a story too. She married to the person who does farming at her early age. Her husband always annoys with his words. She has 1 son and 1 daughter. Their marriages also completed. She arranged her daughter marriage with some government employee and son's marriage with some relative. After marriage, their son asked them to leave the house as he couldn't afford their food and medical expenses. So they left the house and starts living on their own in one small house. They adjusted with what they have. But, suddenly grandfather passes away. Now Bharatamma becomes hopeless. Then her daughter takes her to their house and son-in-law also welcomes her with a smily face and asked her to treat him as their son. So u guys are thinking like "wah- finally a happy ending!!" Right? But your assumption is wrong. She always digs her past and thought about how her life is full of miseries, how her husband mistreats her, how her son asked them to leave home, how they worked hard for their food, how her husband died, how she becomes hopeless like that. She never slept peacefully even after coming to their daughter's house also.

So Guys, what are u thinking about these 3 stories? who suffers more? for whom the problems are more? Is it sravya who thought salary is only the parameter to measure her happiness? Or is it Indu who goes through love failure, forced marriage and divorce?
Or is it Bharatamma who never slept peacefully in her life?

I don't know what u guys are concluded, but in my opinion no one's problems are hard.
Yes, I really thought like that. It's not because their problems look small for me or I can handle them in a better way or I go through bigger problems than them.
It's because we cannot compare problems. Most of the time, The problem severity mostly depends on our perception.

Just think in this way

Sravya, instead of keep applying for higher packages, just she has to focus on her current role and gain expertise, then automatically she will get higher package jobs.

Indu, no need to say anything, she tackles the worst situation well and gain independence by getting the job.
But, if she manages to tackle the family situations also then may be the situations are different now. Anyhow, she is happy with her life now.

Bharatamma- yes, definitely she lived the life miserably. But now, she has food, shelter, members to care for her, and a happy family. Even though she is unhappy as she didn't see the situations correctly. If she is satisfied with what she have, she would be difinetly happy.

There is no parameter to define our emotions, whether it is happy, sad, angry, anything. There is no parameter till now and no one comes in the future also. So don't try to define them with our perception.

And one more thing, please live in the present, I don't say never think about the past and future, as past is like a book which have all the precautions to take care to avoid problems, and future is the only thing that gives us hope to fight today. But please, it's a request to all, please please don't over think about anything either it's past or future.  It's the only way to lead life peacefully.

Thank you guys, just think about this and any feedback is appreciated.