The Pearl Of Great Price

Chapter 15: Truth

The final day of the coronation festivities arrived, at long last. One more day of trying to play nice and make good impressions. One more conclave among the lower lords working out inter-kingdom trade agreements for the Duchy of Suffolk. After one more banquet, the Duke and Duchess will be able to go home. Home to Westhrope Hall. Home to peace and calm and true cheer.

The day before, Charles went on a hunt with His Majesty and other noble Lords. While enjoying a good hunt, he found himself rather tired of all the celebration and merrymaking. It grows wearisome, having to feign joy and felicity. When in truth, he is anything but jubilant or festive.

How could he be when the true queen is rotting away in Kimbolton? Not be outdone by his wife, who has had to bear the shame of being labeled illegitimate. Then there's the fact that unborn children of His Majesty are a higher rank for the throne than she is. Unborn children!

And the Duke is just getting started. On top of those things is how the malicious queen publicly degraded his wife to the Royal Court. This degradation is only topped by the hard slap she gave to Mary. When he thinks of everything his wife has gone through, he's amazed she hasn't given up and lain down in a pit somewhere. So yes. It's pretty difficult to be cheerful and jolly when all you want to do is run the vain woman through with a sword.

At the very least, Ann Boleyn has made an enemy of him. The dangerous thing about her is her ability to twist the king's mind. A true monster will take weaknesses and use them as weapons. The woman has done that. She has taken his friend's deep-seated issue of an heir and is holding him captive with it.

He fancies himself in love with her, but Charles knows the truth. The truth is the same as his pseudo-marriage with Margaret. Lust is never love. Sure it can feel a lot like love, but it's nothing more than a strong appetite, a hunger. A raging fire that can burn whole kingdoms down.

Lust rushes in where love waits and is patient. When you love, you settle down. There's peace and freedom in love, whereas desire binds and threatens. Always wanting but never truly satisfied. There's no peace. With lust, one's position is unclear, unsure, and unstable.

With love, it's the opposite. The position is known outright. Love takes all the instability and insecurities, cares for them, tends them, and helps them get better. Love sets those insecurities on firm, solid ground. Love is stable. Lust is a deadly poison, and anyone who drinks it withers away to nothingness.

Charles tried to tell Henry what he was getting into on the trip to France. But like most things, His Majesty does what he wants and damns the consequences. This is why Charles must do whatever it takes to protect his wife and keep their heads intact.

People may think what they want of him. He has thick skin and the stubbornness to endure it. Let them think he's a foolish idiot led around by his own lust. This may have been who he was two years ago, but he has changed. It's foolishness to think a person can't change, even one as self-absorbed as he used to be.

One of the most significant differences in his life has come in the form of Mary. She loves him, and he loves her. That love propels him to be more helpful, better than he was. To be honorable. To be industrious and everything he set out to be when he was younger before life came along and left his armor dull, flat, and rusty.

Charles admits he has not cared for the political side of his title. However, that is changing too. Even though he did help bring about Cardinal Wolsey's downfall, through his fictitious alliance, with Norfolk and Boleyn. Still, he never really cared. His wife has allowed him to see more clearly.

Not just because of her, no.

He also knows he needs to do so. He is the Lord of the Duchy, so the Duke needs to act like it. Part of acting like it is taking care of and managing it. The only problem has been with not knowing how. Charles wasn't bred for governing like some men are. Instead, he was raised to serve and protect. But then a gift was given to him, his wife.