I'll Wait For You // ONC 2022

CHAPTER NINE

I gasp at the feeling of Danny's body pressing into mine. Tonight, I'll wear my suit, tomorrow the dress. It's the night of the rehearsal dinner and I hate to admit I'm nervous. My eyes met his, in our reflection of the mirror. I'm immersed in the way he pushes my hair aside off my neck, then plants several kisses along the spot, making my entire body hum. I feel like I've woken from a long slumber and I'm just now learning to live.

"Everything okay?" he asks, lifting his head, and resting his chin against my shoulder.

"Couldn't be better." I smile, but it's not lighting up my face.

I despise the small part of me that will always want Bennett, and I hate that. I know I'm not doing this to fill the void he left, I'm doing it because my feelings for Danny are real. That could be our downfall. What if he feels like I'm only with him because I can't be with Bennett? What if other people tell him that? I'd never forgive myself if I hurt either of them, or if I tore them apart.

Spinning me, he pulls me into him. "Hey, Fallon. You alright? I don't want to pressure you to be here with me, or to have you feel obligated..."

"Obligated? You think that I'm here because I feel obligated. Like you confessing is the only reason? That you're just here to fill all the pieces he couldn't?"

"I know you're not that kind of a person, but I can see the fear in your eyes. Are you afraid of what people will say?"

Since the bachelor party, Danny and I have hung low. He and I are trying to figure out the feelings raging between us. Things were tense for the rest of that trip, but we made it through. Bennett and I only spoke if we needed to.

On top of that, we've all been busy with work too. Bennett with his wedding prep, and Everett prepping for his big move. Two days ago, we got the news, he's moving to Boston for a job. There's been tension regarding that too. It almost feels as if this huge chapter in our life is closing. I hate that we could all be those friends that don't see each other for years, and when we get together it's reminiscing of old times and not living in the moment.

"It feels like I'm losing everyone, while gaining this whole new relationship as well."

The light filtering through his window blurs with the tears pushing through. I glance down and blink, releasing a few that find their way out.

"I want this. I want you." My lips tremble. "I want everyone to find their own way, but at the same time I want us all together again, and it feels as if we're more torn apart than ever. I'm sorry, it's stupid."

He crushes me to his chest, running his hand through my hair. Resting his cheek on my head, he sniffles a little too.

"It's not stupid. There are days when I wish we could all go back to high school, because it was easier back then. It didn't feel as if the world was closing in, it felt like we had all this time to be together and nothing would ever change."

"Change sucks."

"It does." He pauses, and sticks his finger under my chin, lifting it with ease.

My eyes meet his.

"But are you at least a little excited to see where this goes?"

"Of course, I am." I reach up, grasping his scruffy face in my hands. I hold onto him like if I let go, he'll be gone forever. "There's always been something there between us. I felt it that night you stayed on the phone with me in college, and I know it was there long before. I'm looking forward to starting this journey together. I hope that you can understand that I can't just drop my feelings for him. It's going to take time."