alone again / Finished BxB /

ice packs

I look at xiever who looks me dead in my eyes and trows one good punch to my face. I deserve this. For saying what i just said and for everything i did. Maybe its my karma . He punchs me again and i fell on the hard concrete  ground.

The ground is still a bit wet from the rain not long ago and dirty and some old food srabs that fell out of the dumpster are laying on the ground. He punches me again but all i do is just smile. I deserve this, right?

I dont even fight back i just let him. There is blood coming from out of my nose down to my lips. I can taste the blood and feel the bruises already forming on my face and the cuts burning.

"Leave" xiever says angery and looks at me like his about to beat me up again if i dont go out of his sight in a few secconds. I get up from the cold concrete ground and shake my head in unbelieve. he cant tell me what to do. I go inside and take my bag i had with me and walk out of the restaurant again.

Apollo saw what xiever did and ran after me. "What the fuck happend to you?" He asks me. "Just xiever being butthurt" i tell him. "I will take u home" he sort of demends me and gets his bike.

I spit out the blood that was in my mouth. I am probably going to have bruises all over my face when i wake up.

I see xiever look at us on the corner of the building when we both left on apollos bike. He looks emotionless again. Hes always gets the same emotionless look no matter what.

We both arive to my place and apollo lets his bike fall agaisnt the concrete and rushes to me. "Are you okay??" He asks me concerned and looking at the bruises all over my face.

"Im fine" i reply. Maybe thats a lie, nobody who is fine just lets them get beat up. I really dont care about what happends to me anymore.

It hurts like ass and i know damn well i cant fuck with xiever again before he murders me or something. I should stay away from all of them again and go back to being strangers who never met.

I go into the elevator and before i could say to leave me alone apollo followes me just before the doors close. "You should leave" i tell him "you need ice on those bruises before it gets worse" he replys to me like its the most normal thing in the world.

I look in the broken mirror in the elevator and see that i really do look as fucked up as i feel like. The bruises arent to blue yet but more red ish and puffy. There is still a trail of fresh blood coming down from my nose just stopping at my lips. There is a bit of dried up blood on my tshirt that i will trow away in a bit.

The elevator stops at my floor and i walk out. Apollo followes me into the apartment before i could shut the door on him.

He goes into my fridge to get a ice pack like he lived here since forever. "Sit" he says to me halfway demanding it.

I sit down and look at the floor. Its embarrasing having him taking care of me. He comes to me and places his finger under my chin to make me look him in the eyes.

He places the ice cold pack agaisnt my skin and i pull back a bit. It hurts like hell , i would rather just let it swell up. 

"Stay still" he says to me and places his hand agaisnt the back of my head so i cant move away from him again. He slowley puts the ice pack against my skin again.

I just bite the insides from my cheeks so i can indure the pain. He slowly moves the pack from one place to the other one. It feels like its burning my skin off even though it got a towel to protect my skin.

"Does it hurt?" He asks me and looks me into my eyes. I look back into his eyes "no" i reply. That was a lie. It hurts so bad but i won't tell him he might think i am weak.

He takes back the ice pack and places it into the fridge again. "Why didnt u fight back?" He asked me with his questioning puppy eyes. I cant just tell him that I deserve it or something stupid.

"Why would i?" I tell him. I am to lazy to fight back anyways. Besides im like stick and bones i didnt have the chance to win anyways. He shrugs his shoulders knowing he doesnt have to awnser too.

"Your tshirt got blood on it" he says to me like i didnt already know. "Oh fuck" i say to him and take off my tshirt. I throw it right into the trash can next to him and grab a random tshirt i could find. 

Apollo is staring at me again like he did this morning. When he sees i catched him looking at me he smiles at me exposing his dimple. Again.

I put on the dark green tshirt i had in my hands. "Why are you always staring?" I ask him and walk to the kitchen his way again.

"Cant i look?" He asks me in a flirty way and comes closer to me. "Mhmm, would you still look even when i tell u not to?" I ask him. Am i really flirting with him?

"I would probably still look" he says and steps even closer. His breath is against my face again and hes just as close as he was to me as yesterday night.

We look into each others again. I have to look up a bit to be able to look into his eyes fully.

"What are u going to do about it?" He asks me and doesnt break the eye conact we have.

"Absolutely nothing" i say laughing at him and walk back so we arent to close again. Apollo looks at me grinning and laughs with me and shakes his head a tiny bit and puts his hand agaisnt the back os his neck and scratches it.

"I should get going" he says to me. I open the door for him so he could leave. "Opening the door for me like a true gentleman?" He says to me and grins. Both of his dimples are visible now. Only both of them appear when he really smiles.

Was he really flirting with me ? Was i really flirting back at him? Did that really just happen or was i knocked out at the ground by xiever.

I pinch myself just to make sure . I am awake what the fuck. I go the bathroom and slash some water on my face. I am not evwn sure if i like guys.

I look into the mirror above the sink and see the way my face looks fucked up. The blue is slowly coming trough and its a bit puffy. The blood coming out of my nose is gone now but i look so bad.

It hurts so much just to even touch it. Do i really deserve this for such a bullshit reason.

Why the fuck didnt he just fucking ask me first instead of beating me up. First this guy acts like a friend and then the next he beats be behind the restaurant in a alley.

I wish i was stronger so i could beat him up too. An eye for a eye. I know im fucked up but so is he. Maybe were both the same amount of fucked up.

I take a picture of my face with my phone. I look horrible and the lighting is off and my hair is looking weird but i wanna post it on Instagram.

Stupid fucking captions. "Beautiful me" i type in for the caption of this shitty post. Nobody is going to care anyways about what i do or how i look like. Everyone will probably like or scroll past it and then scroll in less then 30 seconds so why would i care about a random Instagram post.

I should probably take a shower to wash some off the blood off and just to get my thoughts together at the moment.

The shower barley even got warm water its more like bathing in ice cubes but its fine i guess. I put on some music and step into the ice cold shower and rinse of as fast as i can.

The cold water streams down my hair to my chest making me shiver. I dont even know if the water is helping the wounds.

ahhHH thats it i hope you like ittt and if u got any feedback pls tell meeee