Revenge Has Its Benefits (Il Dottore x Fem! reader)

8.

you woke up because the makeshift pillow under you was shifting. your eyelids weakly opened and you had arrived at the destination.

you peered out the window at the seemingly endless sea. there was a ship blocking most of your view though. you looked to Dottore who was trying to pack things out of the carriage without waking you. it obviously didn't work though, since you were awake and staring at him at the moment.

Dottore finally noticed you and a frown occupied his face. "did i wake you sweetheart?" he whispered. "yeah, we're here?" you asked. "almost, we just have to board this boat and tomorrow we will be there."

he lifted you to sit up. he opened the carriage door and left. he didn't close the door, instead, he stuck out his hand for you to take.

you gladly took it because there was no chance you could get out of there yourself. when you dropped down, the cool breeze waved through your hair. your body shivered and Dottore took notice to that.

he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pulled you closer, helping you walk at the same time. you interrupted yourself from letting your head fall on his shoulder.

you stepped on the wooden plank bridge to enter the boat. you moved to see Dottore gazing at you with a gentle smile. your resting face made it seem like you were sad, but you were just confused.

you were confused as the past week had gone by so fast with no time to process things. last week, Dottore tried to experiment you and turn you into a weapon. now, you were willingly walking on a boat to a different region with him.

the stress caught up to you the second you got into the boat. your eyes watered and tears streamed down your face. you moved your face away from Dottore's, hoping he would just let you go to your room alone.

"wha- did i do something?" Dottore questioned. you pulled out of his grasp but you were still weak, and you caught yourself on the wall before you could fall.

"why- why did you try and turn me into a test subject??? now you're acting like we're 'friends'. you're acting like we didn't almost kill each other!" you stuttered between sobs.

Dottore was taken aback and obviously hurt. "well, it's in the past, isn't it?" he responded in a cold tone. "depends on if you think a week ago counts as the past!" you yelled.

he stepped toward you to help you to your room. instead of his gentle hold from earlier, he tightly gripped your upper arm. you wiggled, hoping to get out, to no avail.

"stop! get off!" you yelled, a lump growing in your throat from crying and yelling. this reminded you too much of the time he almost killed you. you wouldn't let it happen again.

you swung your other arm as hard as you could to his face, but he blocked it with his other hand. now he had both your arms in a strong hold.

tears kept falling from your eyes but contrast to a few minutes ago, he felt no empathy. it was like all the emotion seeped out of his body and was currently gone.

"please, not again.." you whispered as a last resort. you knew he was going to hit you again but this time you had no strength. maybe not feeding you was his plan to make you weak then kill you.

it made sense, considering how pissed he was that he lost the last fight.

your legs gave out and you fell to the floor. his arms were the only thing holding you up. "i won't, but you need to learn to obey me." he responded in a softer, but still stern tone.

you let out a sigh of relief. you didn't quite catch the last words he said, but you were just glad he wasn't killing you. "you still didn't answer," you asked weakly.

"it's my job, but you turned out stronger than i thought. so i let you work with me. that's it." he held back the fact he found you stunning. he genuinely wanted to be with you.

he never felt like that before, so he wanted to... experiment. he couldn't just let these new feelings go.

Dottore carried you bridal style to your room, which was fancy but not as fancy as the one at Dottore's house. "i hate you, you bastard. " you mumbled. you only partly told the truth.

the fact he thought you could just let that go was unrealistic. does he actually care and he's just dumb or does he not care at all? this question flooded your mind.

on the other hand, he was nice to you. he seemed like he cared, despite people telling you he feels no empathy. he was fun to work with, and it was hard to admit but he made you feel... things. then, his voice took you out of your own thoughts.

"i heard that, but i'll pretend i didn't. i know you don't mean that." he dropped you roughly on your bed but sat on your bed with you.

"sorry, i haven't had to deal with these feelings before, i didn't know you were still mad at me for that. it's hard to read you, you know." he admitted. there was one thing that caught your attention in his apology, feelings. what feelings?

"wait, what feelings?" you asked between sniffles. he didn't even notice he said that and his face went red. "shit, uh well i just, never had a human assistant before. totally." he tried to save himself.

his almost confession confused you further. he felt feelings, even though all you heard about him was that he couldn't.

"i'm sorry i yelled at you. i shouldn't have done that." you apologized, finally realizing your anger came out of nowhere. "no, it's not your fault, it's mine for not realizing that you were hurt over that." he reassured.

"i'm still pissed, you'll have to make it up to me tomorrow." you said, not accepting a response as you fell to the pillow.

he turned to you and put his hand on the side of your face. he brushed your hair with his fingers and your eyelids fell, allowing you to fall asleep.

his touch helped you sleep. you could only sleep for a few hours though. you had slept so much in the past few days.

~~~~
you woke up to a lonely and dark room. a part of you hoped Dottore was still there, brushing your hair. you remembered the argument, and immediately retracted your thoughts.

your feelings against the Fatui were softening, and you hated it. this man was friends- no, family with the woman who killed your brother and you were gaining feelings with him. what a traitor you are.

you and your brother had an unbreakable bond and you promised him on your life you'd avenge him. ever since you've been working with Dottore, you've compromised that.

you weren't even sure that what you saw was real. he was strong. in fact, strong enough to be a harbinger. why couldn't he fight off those mere recruits? this was a question that dwelled in your mind ever since the accident.

you shook your head in an attempt to shake away these thoughts and remain in a good mood. the sound of a crowd of people distracted you. you sloppily got dressed and headed out, only to bump into Dottore.

"oh, i was just about to get you! we've docked at Sumeru!" he said in a cheery voice. you ignored him and kept walking. you peered out a window, to see a wave of people watching your ship.

you heard Dottore walking up to you so you fled to the kitchen before he got to you. you pretended like you didn't deliberately ignore him, and you made yourself cereal.

"y/n, don't be like that." his voice made you jerk backwards to see him leaning on a wall beside you. "although, if you are actually still angry, i'll leave you alone. just use your words." he said, picking up your chin to force you to look into his eyes. he had a genuine smile plastered on his face. it was still hard to tell what he felt because of that dumb mask.

"only if you take off the mask." you retaliated, shoving your head out of his grasp to continue making your food. he let out an exaggerated sigh. "if you say so, sweetheart." he gave in.

you didn't actually expect him to accept your request. he lifted his mask without hesitation, and you were not ready for the sight underneath.

"happy now?"