Mirabel angst oneshots

"I'm fine" pt.1TW: SELF HARM

not requested... feel free to give me requests

*Mirabel's pov*

"I'm fine" I say for what felt like the tenth time today in reality I am not fine I don't know why, I really don't, everything was going good, The family was finally being nice to me, Abuela let us all have breaks and Isabella spent more time with me.

Life was going great yet everyday I still feel like this sometimes I feel happy for around an hour or two and then suddenly i would feel like shit again why can't I just be happy, all I want is to be happy, so why cant I? My arm was starting to get really itchy from my sleeves rubbing against my cuts and I was also starting to feel even more faint than I did this morning.

I was brought out my thoughts by abuela clearing her throat getting ready for the lunch speech but then her eyes landed on me "Mirabel are you okay?" she asks making everyone else's eyes land on me too

I nod "mhm yeah I'm fine" I say lying "are you sure? you look a little pale" she adds I just nod "yes I'm sure abuela I feel fine" I say smiling. Hoping that she will believe me and everyone will stop looking at me and lucky for me they did I let out a breath that I didn't know I was holding. Abuela continued on with her lunch announcement and I carried on with my thoughts about life and the meaning of it.

*After lunch*

As soon as lunch ended I got out of there fast. I made my way to the forest with my art book/journal and pencil I needed some time on my own I needed to think. Once I finally got to the forest I found my spot and sat down admiring the nature before opening my journal and starting to write. After a while I stopped writing and found that I had wrote a type of poem??

The poem
written by me

Why do I feel like this?

I haven't done anything

every time I shoot a shot to try rewrite my wrongs I miss

There's voices in my head that I can't get rid of

I wish someone could see that I'm not okay

but no one seems to see my pov

if only I could tell

then maybe just maybe I could get help and be okay once again

but it feels like I'm locked in a cell

I bang on the bars of my cell and scream but there's no way out

I need help why cant anyone see

sometimes I wish I could feel nought

End of poem

(y'all feel free to give me pointers)

My peace was soon interrupted by the voices coming back *kill yourself* *they don't care about you* *no one cares* that's all they said on repeat like a broken record and I was about to break but something rather someone stopped that by showing up "you okay?" They ask "yes but now is not a good time so go away" I reply "Mirabel-" she starts "respect my boundaries remember?" I say starting to draw "yes bu-" she tries but I cut her off "ISABELLA LISTEN TO ME GO FUCKING AWAY" I snap slamming my pen down on my journal she looks at me shocked before turning around and walks away rub my head in frustration and pain " WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME?" I shout "I just want to be okay" I sob before quickly putting my hand over my mouth remembering that someone has super hearing. Suddenly I had the urge to cut so I collected my stuff wiped my eyes and headed back to casita

a/n: oh my god y'all that took fucking ages I've been trying to write this for weeks everyday I would write a little  bit and then have no ideas like dude let me all know if you want a part 2