NEVER IN A FOREVER
N A N D I N I
I just looked at myself in the mirror for one last time. I'm ready. And good enough to start the toughest and hardest part of my life from now on or I can say a forever problem.
MARRIAGE.
Yeah, I'm getting married in an hour. Don't take me wrong but I don't want to get married this soon. I don't hate marriage but I hate marrying the wrong person. Don't ask me how I Know that I'm marrying a wrong person because I just know that.
After dolled up in a red heavy lehenga that was decorated with golden threads and stones, I was looking no less than a Barbie doll.
Hands clad with dark colour mehendi and hand full of bangles, face caked up with minimal makeup because I naturally look good. Aah no I'm not flaunting but that's true I look good naturally.
Everyone are coming to me and congratulating me for my marriage and I just faked a smile to them and sighed inwardly. I don't want to get married but I don't have any option.
Dad will kill him if he finds me doing something wrong and at least for him, I have to get married.
Everyone can see how my skin is glowing but no one can see how my eyes lost their sparkle in them.
I sent my friends outside who were giggling like highschool girls and locked the door before opening a bottle from the first drawer of the small table beside my desk and removed the cap of it.
Grabbing some water, I popped up a pill from the bottle and gulped it down my throat. Yuck, the taste sucks, but I'm used to it by now. oh no, that's not any poison. They are anti-depressants.
I've been taking them for two months and no one is aware of it.
I sighed and kept the bottle back in the drawer and looked at my room. It looks completely empty.
This used to be my safe place, the place filled with my laughter, giggles, cries, chuckles, anger, guilt, regret, everything and this is the place I decorated with my own hands making it cozy and the way I love.
But as I'm getting married, all the things of mine are shifted to my husband's house two days ago leaving a few very important necessities for a few days.
This room won't be mine anymore, this house won't be mine too. Mom won't be coming to my room early in the morning and will wake me up anymore.
I can't fight with my brother for charger, food, tv remote, brag about dresses, tease about the girls he flirts with, go walk with him in the evening and him dropping a chocolate and some money in my bag everyday I go to college anymore.
Dad won't be there to feed me food on nights when I throw tantrums to eat and I can't hug him whenever I feel insecure or low. I'm leaving everything behind and I don't know how to get myself prepared for this new start.
I'm not ready for this new change yet. Hell I didn't even move on from my first love. It's so hard to move on. I don't know how people say it's easy to move on but trust me it is so hard.
It feels as if oxygen has been sucked out of you, it feels hard to breathe, it feels hard to eat, it feels hard to smile, it feels hard to fake that we are okay, every part of us gets killed, it feels like thousands of needles pricking our heart, it feels like millions of ants are biting your flesh, it feels impossible to live, it's just hard to do. It's so fucking hard.
I didn't even realise that tears were already flowing from my eyes, messing up my make up slightly. I went to the mirror and wiped my tears with a tissue and applied make up again.
I heard the door knock and walked upto the door and opened it to find my dad, brother and my best friends.
They know about my love and they tried their level best to make my parents understand but they were helpless.
They even planned to make me run away with my love but I just can't. I can't let my parents down and fail them.
Dad smiled widely before pulling me in his embrace. And reality hit me hard. My surname is also going to change in one hour.
And I won't be the same Nandini again.
I can't wear my comfiest clothes, I can't eat my favourite food, I can't live the way I want, I will be giving my whole life to someone. Simply, a forever life contract.
And tears started to roll down again. Soon my brother and my mom joined in the hug and even they shed tears.
I think they are crying for leaving me, but I'm mourning for the last day of my love and death of my soul.
"Hey you guys are spoiling the make up I did to her for half an hour" Alia, one of my crazy friends exclaimed.
Bitch, I would have smacked your head real hard if you speak one more word. I groaned mentally but actually laughed.
She is trying to cheer me up, but honey, I'm already dead. But hey, that was funny. But yes I'm lucky to have these idiots with me.
One is completely crazy and one just looks innocent but knows all the double meaning words and one is completely an idiot and one is so possessive for everyone of us and trust me you would never wish to see her when she is cursing because she won't actually care who is in front of her and she is grumbling from half an hour that she is hungry.
She is going to hit the caterer with her 2 inches sharp heel if he won't arrange food in a few minutes and I can really feel it.

CZYTASZ
NEVER IN A FOREVER (Manan - Completed)
FanfictionA arranged marriage A traditional girl who loved a boy with her whole heart and everything in her life was going okay with friends, family, love everything and that's when a storm came. Marriage. Her parents were orthodox and doesn't like the concep...