No Way But Down

1

"Femi..."

Inhaling awake, I felt Rocco cup my cheek with his hand. I didn't realize I fell asleep. Squirming I reached for my phone feeling Rocco hug my back, I felt a poke which caused me to smirk.

"Yep, my mother is pissed."

I mumbled scrolling through the missed calls, it's happened only once before so I had some good credibility behind me. Being a star college graduate with a humble attitude I have some leeway. Then again it's not like I took her opinion after she married herself off to a drug dealer. Then again who am I to judge?

"Femi just stay the rest of the day."

"You know I can't."

Wiggling out of Rocco's grip, I fluffed my sunset hair cracking my neck with a sigh, before I officially climbed out of bed Rocco pulled me back into his arms. Before I could say anything else, he pulled me into a soft kiss holding it till he felt my resistance relax his chocolate skin glistening in the sunlight as I slammed his back down onto his pillow.

"You're such a pervert."

"You like that."

Rocco replied, running his hands up my chest, gently squeezing my caramel skin. Even the sun was hitting my underwear and tank top right too. We got a quickie in before I showered and changed into a yellow dress with an orchid pattern. Clicking on my black choker, I pulled my hair into a ponytail as Rocco kissed my shoulder before leaving out before me. Adjusting my black flats and then purse, we've been on and off for a few years. Our lives are separate and he's never asked for anything else but sex. There are times when he gives me these long gazes, like he wants to confess something but never does, either way, I was thinking of breaking it off since it wasn't going anywhere. Taking the bus back home, I walked down the sidewalk then power walked up to my porch to get another phone call from my mother. She opened the front door to see me waving at her.

"Don't act so casual I was worried sick!"

"I'm sorry Mom-"

"Sorry isn't good enough! Where were you?!"

"I was sleeping over with Rocco."

She knows he exists and I've brought him over here before, but she doesn't know him that well. My stepfather didn't mind, I caught him in the kitchen making something as I walked into the house.

"Rocco?! He's a year older than you! You shouldn't be hanging around with-"

"Easy darling, you'll stress her out."

My stepfather cut her off, the only thing I liked about him was that he made her happy. It took her a long time to get over my father's sudden death, as for me I never really got over it. I just got stuck, the only thing that breaks me out of the funk is Rocco or playing the violin. Speaking of I have a show today.

"She has a show today, why don't we go?"

"I'm not going anywhere with someone who blatantly disrespects me!"

My mother finished as we locked eyes, I blinked away from her and went upstairs to my bedroom. Picking up my violin I pulled it over my shoulder and wore it like a backpack, I'm very glad I put some extra clothes at Rocco's. Hearing a small knock on the door I said.

"Come in."

While rubbing some lipstick on my face, my stepfather creaked my bedroom door open. I called him a drug dealer before because he's always at home but pays all the major bills. Sure he could be working at home, but something about it seems fishy since whenever I ask what he's up to he always says working. Always dodging the question and keeping it vague. I think that's why whenever we're alone he makes me uncomfortable.

"So, Rocco is a respectable man?"

"He'd say he is, but he isn't doing anything wrong towards me if that's what you're asking."

"That's good. Have you ever thought of joining me in my work? It's pharmaceutical but pays well."

See what I mean?

"I have, though I do have a love for music though."

"Understandable. Have a good concert."

"Thank you."

I finished, pulling out my phone and seeing a few photos sent by Rocco. I made the good choice of not opening them, then made my way to my car. A black Ford Fusion, flipping my keys in my hand, I put my violin case and all into the back seat but strapped in then climbed into the driver seat dropping my purse in the passenger. Pressing the garage door button as it rose slowly, I adjusted my mirrors. Staring at my dark green pupils for a moment before looking back at the concrete. Before I pulled off the driveway I saw my Mom wave at my window, I pressed the button so the window could roll down and I could hear her.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you, I just get so worried you know?"

"I know."

I replied as she clasped my free hand. My father dying of a sudden aneurysm makes it likely that the same thing could happen to me. Sometimes I wonder how her life would change if I died of the same thing.

"I should be able to make it to your concert."

"Don't push yourself, Mom."

Gently retreating my hand from hers, in the beginning, she went to all my concerts. Nowadays she doesn't make it to most of them. But I can't blame her, whether it's the alcohol or being a surgeon, someone's edge always fills over time. Making sure my Mom was clear of the car I drove off with an image of her pained smile in my head over to the amphitheater. I parked in the reserve space for the musicians, ignoring the noticeable star on my name while climbing out grabbing my violin and purse.

"Femi, glad to see you as always."

Gyasi, the conductor said to me as we kissed each other's cheeks. Aishah was next to me glad to see me as well, I always come at least an hour before the concert starts.

"Any particular makeup today?"

"Not really, you always hook me up nicely Aishah."

Her milk chocolate skin gleamed in my compliment as I walked with them, into my dressing room.