The face of the desert

Again, a sand shined golden. He wasn't supposed to remember his past rebirths in this vicious circle. But the brain over and over again clung to some fragments of memories, depriving them of any emotions, leaving only images. Endless sands. Somewhere far away in the subconscious was a snowy desert, so cold even to remember. It was everywhere. Always. But the golden sand was the brightest, closest and most beautiful. It was here, in front of Him right now. This is what He remembered best of all. Loved and hated. Because since the memory broke down, refusing to get rid of the memories of past lives, those lives began to fall on his shoulders like a ton of grains of sand carried by the wind.

The sand was soft. Gentle, if He didn't move rough. Too pleasant to follow somewhere. To rush into the unchanging unknown, always leading to the same conclusion. And there was no way to break the cycle, go out of the usual path. So He didn't want to go anymore. There wasn't anywhere to go.

Grain after grain of sand covered the red robe — the sand devoured the surrendered prey, accepted it into its arms. Becoming part of the desert seemed like a better choice than endlessly repeating the exhausting path again and again. What for? He never had any reason, so He went where He saw where His feet led. Where the soul wanted. Now the soul was silent. In its place a void was formed, swept up by sand dust.

He felt a wet touch, opened his eyes. A lone fennec fox licked His salty cheek. Seeing that the object of interest woke up, the desert fox moved away, looking invitingly. Persistently. Confidently.

With difficulty he managed to get up. Body and mind gave up, so it was hard for Him to force himself to move again. However, something new in the emptiness of this world prompted a desire to give life another chance. To come somewhere else.

Sandy waves paved the way, allowing Him to slide in a hopeless attempt to catch up with the unnaturally nimble animal. Farther and farther. He was so focused on the fennec fox that he didn't notice, when the light began to fill the space, how more and more sand began to reflect gold. And then a golden light began to mix with a blue glow. A perfectly round lake with the most transparent water, surrounded by golden nothing, appeared before Him. In the water now and then the facets of something unknown shone with a blue brilliance, as if the lake was not full of water, but lake was a crystal with cracks beneath. Alive. Liquid. Strange. On the other side of the lake, a fennec fox sat nobly. In the overflows of gold, the shadow of an animal flickered, but at the same time of something else. The true incomprehensible essence hidden in the illusion of a small body. The shadow played with golden light like desert sand. It lived its own life, like desert sand, uplifted and carried by the wind. The desert itself appeared before Him.

The fennec fox looked straight into His eyes, waiting. As if it was hypnotizing with a look so that He would go to him right across the lake. And so He did. The first touch with blue non-water brought relief to the soul, it became easier to perceive thoughts about past adventures. With depth, thoughts completely disappeared, there was no more past — it became easier for Him to breathe. Immersed completely in the blue radiance, He closed His eyes...

A sand shined golden. He opened His eyes. In front of him was an endless desert and the only one way.