Within/Without

Invasion of memories

Lakshmi opened her eyes with a start. Her heart thumped loudly. She took a few deep breaths and looked wildly around her, trying to orient herself. Everything seemed to be in place- the walls were still standing, and there was no crack (other than the old ones) on the ceiling. Her hands trembled as she reached out for the glass of water next to her bedside. She drank it greedily and a little water trickled down her chin. She put her hand on her heart to stop it from beating so fast. "It won't be a dream for long, though." She thought as she wiped off the water with the ends of her padar. "This house will be gone in a few months, although not because of my doing. And my nightmare will become a reality. What shall I do then!" she muttered to herself and slowly swung out of bed. Her bones groaned in protest as she walked to the fan to switch it off. The air from the fan made her body heavy, but it was a necessity in this heat. She stretched her aching back and looked out the window. The sky was a reddish pink, the dawn rapidly making way for the morning sun. The pigeons were making a racket -- gutter goo gutter goo gutter goo, they called out as they pecked away at the grains she had left out the night before. It was Sunday, so she could have technically slept in a little more, but sleep was not to be had after her intense dream. She went into the kitchen to make some chai.

After taking a calming bath, she stepped into the balcony in her standard light cotton saree, ironed and pressed, the citrusy detergent still lingering on it. She rubbed her wet salt and pepper hair and squinted at the morning sun that already shone with great intensity, foreboding what was to come- dry heat that gave you headaches and impatience. She watered the small Tulsi plant and said her morning prayers.

"Lakshmi ajji! Lakshmi ajji!" Sandeep tore up the steps, yelling at the top of his voice. "Lakshmi ajji!" He panted, out of breath, holding the side of his stomach.

"Ajoba is calling you. Right away. Something important."

Lakshmi opened her eyes wide and frowned at the disruptor as she finished her prayers. She poured the rest of the water on the tulsi plant and plucked a leaf to put in her mouth, silently offering one to Sandeep who made a face at its slightly bitter taste.

Before she could utter a word, Sandeep started talking impatiently. "I know what it is. I overheard." He exclaimed. "A foreigner is coming to the Wada. He lives in America, and he is coming to make a film about the Wada. He is a director. Maybe I can act in it. You can be my heroine." He added cheekily. "Ajoba is calling you. Come quick."

"Heroine, indeed!" She smiled at him. "Kids nowadays! If I had said something like that when I was small, I was sure to have gotten a rap on my knuckles for being disrespectful. Your great-grandmother, my Ajji, would have admonished me only as Ajji could, and I would be left burning in shame. But you kids get off easy. You get chuckles instead of knuckles!" She smiled at her little joke.

Sandeep tore down the steps again. His lanky legs swiftly took him on his mission to spread the exciting news to his friends in the Wada. A hundred questions came into Lakshmi's mind as she followed him. She nervously tested the railing as she walked down the steps, remembering her vivid dream. She needed to get to the bottom of this right away, so she rapidly made her way across the lower courtyard to her ancestral home, the Upper Wada.

She stopped for a moment to catch her breath as she reached the gate that divided the Lower Wada from the Upper one. Through the gate, she watched Vinayak, her older brother- Vinayak Saheb to many, Vinu to his close family and friends, Ajoba to his grandchildren and other children, and Dada to her. Vinayak was pacing in the courtyard, taking furious steps. He paced like that when he was excited about something –quick, short steps, hands joined behind his back, head held high, his tall body still straight for his age, pacing exactly as their father did.