When Johnny comes marching

Prologue

It was time. I knew it.

Nothing could stop the going of time. Time did not heal the wounds that it has caused and the time you have lost you can never recover. Now I lie before my death and dream of going back. Back to the past to fix it, fix It.

It, the thing that drew me and my sister apart. Even now I cannot think about It. The secrets and misery It has caused. The dreams are still the same. I dream of a younger me. It's soon time for me to go. I have been on this earth long enough, and I have brought great things into it. My son, and he my grand children. Many would say they do not have a favorite child or grand child. But I will tell my sin to you, for I have chosen my lovely little darling, my lovely Helena.

She is the one I shall miss the most. Her lovely laugh, and her hazel eyes. But I know she shall prevail in life. I smiled slightly, making my cheeks tingle because of the unusual pull.

The darling nurse distracts me from my thoughts when she knocks on my door. That brought me one of my few lucky memories. It had been on a clear April day, when I had suggested to my little Helena that I would be put in a home since I had a problem taking care of myself. She had become so angry with me. She had stomped her foot and said in her strictest voice that if I would need help, then someone would be going over to me.

It has now gone three years, and my faltering health has only increased. I thanked the lord every day for Maria. Her kind nursing and company had helped me trough many of my attacks.

My cloudy eyes scanned the roof, the same old timber, the same old cracks. The rooms in my small flat was sparsely decorated, the only real extravaganza was the wonderful flowers my grandchild brought me every second day to "make my day a little brighter" like she would say.

"God morning, how are you today then ma'am?" Maria said, before making her way to the chair next to mine. I slowly turned my face from the roof and looked into her eyes with a smile.

"I am fine thank you. How are the kids?" She could not help but smile before she told me about young Jackson who had just started to crawl and how young Yvonne had gotten an excellent grade on her last test. She walked to my beaureau pulling out the small deck of cards. Like always she looked at the inscription in the silver etuié.

"Someday you'll have to tell me about this deck, ." She said before walking up to me and sat down. She slowly started to distribute the cards.

"Now, what shall we play."

-#-

It had been a truly wonderfull day. But when the night came, I started to daydream once more. Thinking about my past, the secrets it kept and the idiocy that it had resulted in. When I slowly drifted of to sleep I knew deep inside that this would be the last time I sleep