𝐕𝐄𝐗𝐄𝐃 ❷

𝟒𝟒. ✭ 𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐈 ✭

A noise at our bedroom door has Tristan ending the call automatically. I sigh as he shuts off the device before standing up and putting it away at the top of his wardrobe. This wasn't the first time I was unable to say goodbye to Torey and Brooks over our phone calls via Tristan hanging up. It seems to be a reoccurring theme. 

"Sorry, we just can't risk it," he says as he shrugs out of his suit jacket and places it on a hanger. I give him a few nods before going over to my dresser.

The fact of the matter is, even though Tristan said that, I don't think that's why he hung up. I'd seen the way he couldn't make eye contact with Torey and Brooks, with me as he stated the last facts about the wedding. I'd caught how he'd swallowed away his emotion. It's something he does a lot here lately.

When he would play with Wolfie I would catch his genuine joy and laughter but it was always followed by a dose of melancholy. We'd go back to our room, much like we had tonight, and he'd look lost in thought. Whenever I'd ask him what was wrong he would just silently shrug it off but I'd had an idea, and the way I'd witnessed him tonight, well, that confirmed a lingering suspicion.

My fingers dance over a silky nightdress that's pitch-black and adorned with lace. All of my night clothes look much the same just in different shades. It had me questioning who'd been the one to select my wardrobe since they looked more like lingerie than something to sleep in. Sexiness aside, they are rather comfortable.

Looking over my shoulder I see that Tristan is in the bathroom. I take my blouse off, then my bra, and step out of my shoes before doing the same with my pants. There's a slight ache in my back that I stretch out with a groan. I snatch the black sleep attire and  put it on, pulling the hem down over my hips.

When I go to turn around I find Tristan leaning against the bathroom doorway watching me intently. Those eyes of his hold mine before they roam over my body in a way that makes my mouth go dry, but then he studiously looks away, pushing off the doorframe to go to his own dresser. He'd never looked at me quite like that, not so openly at least.

I head into the bathroom and make quick work of brushing my teeth, combing my hair, and other human necessities. When I open the door I'm met with Tristan undressing himself, and just like he had watched me, I find myself doing the same with him.

He tugs the hem of his undershirt out of his pants then takes it off, revealing a muscular body, one that's fit and free of ink. It's a body I've seen many a time and slept next to many a night. Those large arms managed to find their way around my waist as we'd sleep and I would wake up to find myself pressed against him.

Aside from holding my son, it was the only physical comfort I had and I'd found myself unable to sleep properly without it. It's a fact that scared me like nothing else. Even being here, stuck in this unescapable fortress, the thought of needing Tristan terrified me the most.

Constant internal reminders I'd given myself of why I can't feel a thing for him had been my savior initially. He was my captor, my jailor. That's what I'd known him as originally. Now knowing that he is only here because he was sent to watch over Torey and now is watching over me, my son, well, that struck a different cord entirely. He is here to save me and my son. Not only is he risking his future by agreeing to marry me, he is risking his life. All of this, this entire situation, could get him killed.

A clearing of a throat has me realizing I'm just standing, staring at him in his underwear. I look away immediately feeling the flush of embarrassment against my cheeks. I walk to the bed with eyes studiously on the floor before climbing into it. I nuzzle into my pillow as I lie on my side. Tristan climbs in next to me like he does every night.

After a few quiet moments he murmurs, "you were watching me." When I don't reply he asks, "Why?"

"Because you were watching me." The words were said in a monotone manner into the darkness of the room.

"I'm sorry... I couldn't help myself." I have no idea why he's apologizing considering I'd done the same to him. "I just... when I came out of the bathroom and saw you stretching like that..." The bed shifts under his weight as he moves to come up alongside me. "I just couldn't help myself." And neither could I, if I was being honest with myself. His nose runs up and down the crook of my neck several times which sends a shiver up my spine. Tristan surprises me by placing a soft kiss on my neck before pulling away completely.

"Where are you going?" I find myself blurting out.

"To the other side of the bed, where I should be." He lets out a long, frustrated breath. "Where I have to be." But a familiar feeling in the pit of my belly has me wishing he wouldn't have. It has me realizing just how long it's actually been since I'd done certain intimate things with a man.

"Do you want to be?"

"You know I don't."

"How am I supposed to know that?" He blows out a deep breath in response. "What?"

"Because," he comes up alongside me again, body pressed flush against mine, "seeing you in these," he tugs the hem of my dress, "every single fucking night, having to try and sleep right next to you has driven me nearly insane. I have to fight the urge not to touch you, not to kiss you." His fingers tease the skin on my thigh, causing me to shiver beneath his touch. "I know you know that."

"Know what?" The words were a trembled murmur. He pushes into me so I can feel his hardened length press against my backside. "Trist—"

"Fuck." He pulls away from me immediately and rolls to his side of the bed. "Fuck fuck fuuuuuuck!"

"Tristan, it's okay. It's fine." I turn towards him. "Really, it's fine."

"No, Dani, no it's not fine, it's everything but fine. I know what you feel for me isn't real. I know this is a charade but fuck me I want you so fucking bad. I can hardly stand it to the point that I practically just forced myself on you."

"You didn't force yourself on me," I say as I roll over and turn on the bedside lamp. When I look back over to him his forearm is thrown over his eyes. "You can't force yourself on someone who... who uhm..." I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear feeling unsure of what exactly I want to say.

"You can't force yourself on someone who, what?" Tristan removes his forearm from his eyes and brings them to mine, searching for the words. I bite my lip nervously when his eyes broaden marginally in understanding. "Daniela, you're killing me here."

"I don't mean to. It's not easy for me either. Do you not think I'm effected by you?" I make a point of looking over his fit, shirtless body. "Because I very much am." He closes his eyes tight and blows a breath out through his nostrils. "This whole thing is really complicated, Tristan. It's not easy on any of us, feelings included."

"Knowing you share similar ones to mine makes everything that much harder. Knowing you want me like I want you... in that way..." He looks over to me with brows furrowed, features tight. "It's going to make it next to impossible to just pretend."

"I know."

"And you know we can't go there." He reaches out and caresses my face. "Even if we want to, if we're tempted, we can't. It's just the circumstance that's making us feel this way. That's it. Nothing more." Whether he's trying to convince himself or me, the both of us, I'm not really sure.

"Right."

He slowly pulls his hand away from me. But those hazel depths, colored more with blue at the moment, swirl with something more.

A/N:
I hadn't originally planned to write this chapter, so it's not that long, but I've been rather obsessed with the song above and it just kind of came to me.

Happy Sunday!
♥️