"Where Is She?"

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A/N: HEYYYYY! Guess who's back?? That's right, it's me. Sorry I've been gone for so long! I've been in France the past few weeks, but I'm home. now and ready to write! This one was requested by Hogwarts1smyH0me! I hope you enjoy.

(Y/N/N = your nickname, as always)

TW: Anxiety attack

TOM'S POV:

I loved Y/N, but more than anything I felt bad for her. Dating me was the cause of most of her pain, though she'd never admit it, and I knew dating film's newest sweetheart was no cakewalk. Since we'd gone public, Y/N had been the victim of multiple scathing comments, a few death threats, and one very dedicated stalker. Though she had laughed it off like these things were no big deal, there's only so much people can take. And I was worried.

Shit really hit the fan one night at a party we'd gone to. I've attended so many I can't even remember whose party it was or what it was for. Birthday? Album release? Random rager? Who knew. But I do remember that a few hours in, Y/N decided she was tired, so I offered to take her home.

"I'm sorry," she told me, shaking her head at the ground. "You shouldn't have to leave just because your stupid girlfriend decided her social anxiety was acting up." She tugged her shawl a little closer to her. I shook my head and opened the door for her.

"Nonsense! You're my first priority and I love you. Besides, I'd rather be with you than all of the guests in the world drunk on their daddy's money." A car was waiting for us outside and we began making our way towards it. However, suddenly, we were mobbed by a swarm of paperazzi with flashing camera-bulbs. I gripped Y/N's wrist protectively and she took a shaky breath. "Don't worry," I whispered. "It's a Hollywood party. There's millions of celebrities in one place. They're just hoping to catch something interesting, they're not here for us."

But no sooner had I spoken than someone dragged Y/N away from me and into a circle of mics and camera flashes. 

"Y/N, what about Tom Holland first caught your eye?"

"Did you agree to go out with him just because he's famous?"

"Were you ever a fan before the two of you dated?"

"Are you concerned Tom's only dating you for fun?"

"What about you do you think would have caught Tom's eye?"

"He could have had any A-lister he wanted, but he picked you. Why?"

I watched in horror as Y/N turned around in the circle. Her fearful eyes were as wide as saucers and whenever she tried to open her mouth to respond, someone interrupted. I tried to get to her, but was pushed away by multiple people. I looked at her hands where they lay at her sides and noticed them beginning to shake. Tears filled her eyes. A man grabbed me by my collar and when I looked back, Y/N was gone.

I was filled with a wave of fury I had never felt in my life. The attention turned to me and I blinked against the flashes of light.

"WHERE THE HELL IS SHE? WHERE'S Y/N? WHERE'S MY GIRLFRIEND?"

I shoved off the paperazzi and followed the only path I saw through the crowd. They were still bumbling about themselves and Y/N was nowhere in sight. 

I cursed to myself and started down the quiet street. There was a park at the end of the road, so I decided to look for there. I could hear a little babbling fountain nearby, so I followed the sound to find Y/N sat on the edge, clutching her knees to her chest and breathing a little too quickly.

"Oh my god, Y/N/N, there you are! Are you okay?" No response. I sat down next to her and touched her arm. She was quaking so hard she was practically vibrating and though she was so obviously struggling to breathe, tears were pouring down her face. Her mouth opened and shut repeatedly as she tried to talk to me, but all that came out was a little yelp here and there.

"Okay, shhh, it's okay. It's okay, don't try to talk." I wiped her tears with my thumbs, trying not to cry myself. "Can you breathe for me? Can you try to breathe?" She tried to take deep breaths, gasping for air.

"M-m-my f-face is t-t-tingly," Y/N managed. I hushed her again, repeating my instructions for her to breathe. Eventually, her shoulders rose and fell as normal, but the shaking hadn't stopped.

"I'm so sorry they did that to you," I choked out, a tear slipping down my cheek. "And I tried but I couldn't do anything and I feel like the worst boyfriend in the world."

"No, no, it's not your fault," she managed wobbly, brushing my face. "It's okay."

"It's not okay!" I cried. "You don't deserve this abuse. It's not good for you. You shouldn't be with me."

"Tom, look at me," she said, tilting my head up so I could look into her eyes. "I don't care what happens as long as I'm with you. You make me the happiest I've ever been and that's worth anything."

We sat there for a long time, just holding each other, before the car found us to take us home.

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