Drowning (a depressed Percy story)

Part 1- just another day...

Percy's POV-

As I wake up to the breakfast horn...I just want to lie back in bed and never wake up...but no. I can't do that. I have to go to breakfast or people will wonder where I am. Wonder leads to curiosity, curiosity leads to suspicion, suspicion leads to findings, and findings lead to being caught.

'But hey, it's not like I'm doing anything wrong! I'm not harming others or anything... only myself, I mean, I deserve it right? If I had just not had beckendorf come, or maybe made a cushioning bubble for him to float down in...if only...if only...

But he's not the only one...silena...oh she was a hero. No matter what anyone from the Aphrodite cabin will say...Luke...well he was also a hero! Just...he was the first one there for me at camp...he was also one of the first ones to turn against me as well...'

'Nonono' I thought, shaking my head, ' bad Percy! Bad thoughts mean flashbacks. We have to get to breakfast!'

When I arrive at the pavilion(?), I receive many smiles and happy greetings, as every other day. I picked up my my plate of blue bacon and a blue apple before cutting a third off the apple and scraping it into the fire pit, along with a piece of bacon, before heading back to the Poseidon table.

You see, Grover has been away at a school, picking up more demigods. Tyson, well, he's still in the forges (and whatever guard he was at the end of both series with Percy, I forgot), happy as ever, visiting every other month. So I was all alone at the table.

Me and annabeth would still sign silly messages to one another, just this time, the words 'I love you' were never a part of the conversation...

Hey seaweed brain.

Hey wise girl.

We both laughed.

But then her expression turned serious.

Now, I know you just got back to camp...but, are you ok? I know you said Paul was getting better but...I'm scared for you Percy, I can tell you're wearing makeup...also...I heard from your mom that you've been having nightmares...are you ok? Really? I know that it's hard with the breakup, and I'm truly sorry about that, but please, we're still friends, talk to me, please.

I couldn't reply...so I just fake smiled my best smile and gave a peace sign as I lied through my hands with a clenched jaw.

Yup! The makeup is for previous scars from last year! Nothing big. Paul is nicer now! And really it's fine, you can't help who you fall in love with. And if you realized that you don't like guys, that's fine, I can't be rude anyways, because it would be hypocritical of me as a pan person.

She gasped.

Percy! People might be watching us right now! They might know sign!

Yeah, I know but if they know sign they probably aren't someone we know, therefore the won't get involved.

Yeah...I suppose...

After I finished breakfast I had to go to sparring, as, I was now the instructor of the swords group, I had Leo and piper help me out (annabeth was busy).

"Ok so that is how you get someone's weapon away from them, good?" I asked. Some replying with yes and others with no. "Ok then, if you don't then find a partner who does, vise-versa (?)."

"Hey Percy...?" Asked a serious Piper, "yeah?" I replied. I'm

"Are you ok? The bags under your eyes have gotten darker recently, and you seem far off more often..." "pfttt- me? Yeah, I'm all good, just been trying to read this book that annabeth recommended for me! I'm not making much progress so far...ya know...dyslexia and stuff," I reply with a goofy fake smile, while sheepishly rubbing the back of my neck in embarrassment.

"Oh, ok ig," 'gods damn it...I think suspicions are rising...I guess I'm gonna need more make up then' I think, exasperated.m

Time skip to at Percy's cabin before dinner

3rd POV-

As the green eyed boy sat on him bed he was met with a panic attack. He had just remembered a good memory with a friend, what else would happen? Images of her dying body flashed in his mind like pictures of black and white. Images of her with her boyfriend appeared. 'Nonono...they're dead...they're dead...maybe if I had just...'

His breathing sped up...

Soon enough he was laying in the restroom the his sword, riptide, next to him. A gift that was never intended for the purpose of self inflicted pain...(idk if the cabins have toilets but I think they do...?)Red puffy scars with beads of blood, all over his thighs just above the length of basketball shorts...

As he came back to his senses, he pressed the flat side of the bronze sword into his calf. The monster slaying weapon burning him slightly, as it does, he silently wonders where he left the ambrosia as the hide the burn mark.

After wrapping the wounds, he sits there. Crying. But...also smiling...not a sincere smile of course...but...still...a goofy grin, not made to be paired with glistening tears such as his own.

The weapon glowed slightly as it transformed back into a pen, the cap put on by the raven haired boy. 'Aahhh...' he sighed mentally before reconsidering and taking the cap off once more, faces flashing in his mind, all saying "it's all your fault!"

By the next hour, he had another 21 cuts on each thigh, all wrapped and bandaged before sleep took over, the boy leaning onto the fountain.

But...he didn't know that someone just happened to want to visit him as he poured a little bit of ambrosia onto the burn mark on his calf and heard his mutters of "too bad I have to heal it...why can't I just use the excuse, 'I fell on riptide and it burnt me'? Well because, when your fatal flaw is loyalty, you hate lying to your friends!"

The person left to think about what had just happened and decides on seeing if he was awake when the dinner horn sounds.

At the time that it did, he walks to Percy's cabin and knocks on his door to see Percy get up and walk there from the window ( he had opened it after cleaning up everything) "nico??" He opens the door.

"Yeah..?"

"Why are you here?"

"Well technically I'm not a camper here (I think?), so I'm aloud to sit at your table, and you seemed pretty lonely sooo, here I am"

"oh, uh, ok"