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Three | Riley

"JB, what's the worst that'll happen?" Liam asked as we stood at our front door the following morning, he wanted me to return to some form or normality, so in that head of his.. He thinks shipping me off to school already is the way to go 
"I could name a few things" I muttered to myself as Liam rolled his eyes
"If you don't go today, you won't ever go Jelly bean, I know you too well" He said making me sigh as I turned to head out of the door 
"just try okay? If it really does get too much, shoot me a text and I'll come and get you" Liam said leaning against the door frame 

I nodded, exchanged a goodbye with him as I headed down the road. The further down the road I got the more the crowd in front of me seemed familiar 
Michelle was the girl amongst all of the guys, I had no idea who the rest of them all but in a sea of unfamiliar faces, it was nice to think I knew at least one person

"Riley!" Michelle called turning to face me, my eyes went wide as I watched the group completely stop in their tracks while Michelle headed over interlocking our arms allowing her to drag me back over to the group of teenagers 

I watched as each other them looked at me,. I dare not even think about what their thoughts were saying about me.. I don't think I want to know if I'm honest

"Riley meet the boys, we have Eldon, Hunter, West and James. Boys this is Riley" Michelle said making them all offer me smiles
"Wait Riley? I thought her name was JB?" Hunter said making me internally groan
"That's what my brother calls me" I muttered making him raise a brow at me
"Is there a meaning behind it?" He questioned making me nod

"His nickname for me as a kid was Jelly bean, he still calls me it but as we both grew up he just started to call me JB. He calls me that more then he calls me Riley" I explained
"That's sweet" Michelle said smiling from ear to ear 

I wanted to run away, my plan was I was going to stick to the side lines, blend into the background. Not get sucked into any of this friendship stuff
But Michelle has enough ardour to pull anyone in and I think anyone would be able to guess the moment she pulls you in, she'll cling on and will not let you go 

But I don't think I'm getting out of this that easily..

--

Today's been pretty timid. Nothing has really come from it, lucky for me I've had lesson's with everyone I had met this morning, there have been a few where we were all together and I could kind of exclude myself but there are also some where I was on my own with one or two of them
For example, Maths we are all together but with French, it's just West and Hunter 

I walked into my Art class only to see a familiar face sat at the back, before I had the chance to look else where James lifted his head nodding in my direction offering me a smile before motioning to the seat next to him

"so she dances and she's into art? What else are you keeping under wraps?" He asked making me chuckle lightly before I caught on to what I had just done
I quickly put a stop to the laugh and the smile taking a seat next to James 

"You don't need to attempt to hide that you know" James said making me look at him confused
"The whole, I can't smile because they aren't here thing you've got going on? I've done that for many a years but it won't last. Not around here" He said looking over to me
"How, I -er" I stuttered
"You have the same stigma I had when it happened to me, but something tells me you might be a little more stubborn then I am" He shrugged

"I lost my Dad, I was 13. It was an illness and it happened quicker then I think any of us thought it would but here we are" he said making me look at him a little taken back
Dare I think that someone could have gone through something similar? 

"I'm not expecting you to tell me what happened Riley but I can say that telling someone helped me so I'm all ears if you ever need it" He said making him offer me a small smile one I sort of returned to a degree

Before I could say anything else our teacher had walked in and began talking about our topics for this class but I won't lie.. It was going in one ear and out the other 

I looked around the room to see the students all head down beginning to work on their pieces but I couldn't, I didn't know where to start, what to do. I had no way of clearing my head right now 
I had prewarned Liam it was all too soon, this whole environment was too much and too intense for me right now but Liam obviously knows best...

So obviously that it would explain as to why I've just ran right out of this room with no turning back in sight.

I got outside and allowed the cold air to hit my face in the hope it would calm me down but in fact it was stressing me out more
The fact that it was cold enough I could see my breath, I could see how fast I was breathing, how much air I was pushing out of my body was enough to drive anyone insane 

Before I could say anything or do anything else I felt a hand place itself on my shoulder, I looked over my shoulder to see James stood there with an expression on his face that made it clear this wasn't the first time he'd seen something like this.

"I'm going to do something okay? But if it's too much. Just say the word and I'll stop" He said making me look at him confused before slowly nodding 

He took his hand off my shoulder before taking a step forward opening his arms before engulfing me into a small yet tight hug
One I didn't even realise I needed..

The longer his hold on me was, the more control I got on my breathing, the more my head cleared, the more that the world around us seemed to just slowly come to a halt
Like nothing else mattered

I looked up to see James looking down at me while his head still gently rested on top of mind
"Are you okay?" He asked, but I honestly didn't have an answer if I'm really honest