Two of a Kind

Chapter 30 - Nightmares of losing you

Almost every night he imagined himself as the Winter Soldier again but he was ripped away from you and Hydra ordered him to kill you. So over the coming nights, as he was with you, he hadn't gotten much sleep.

The nurses and doctors keep checking on you, repositioning you every couple of hours over and checking your vitals over the next few days. Clint also visits you and Bucky every day, talks to the doctors about your results, and spends time with Bucky. The week flies by the time Clint has to head back to his house. Clint comes by the hospital the morning before he leaves. 

"Hey." Clint says as he comes into the room

"Hey." Bucky responds

"Well, I'm heading out but I stopped by to see if you needed anything."

Bucky shakes his head, "No, I'm okay but I'll let you know if anything happens."

"Okay, perfect. Thanks again for staying with her, I really appreciate it."

"Yeah, no problem."

Clint waits until one of the doctors comes by to let them know that he'll be gone for the week. Dr. Hawkins walks into the room with a nurse. The nurse started checking your vitals and repositioned you.

"Mr. Barton. Mr. Barnes. How are you guys?" Dr. Hawkins greets Clint and Bucky

"We're doing okay," Clint responded

"Has anything changed with her condition?" Bucky asks

"As far as we can tell there haven't been any major changes." Dr. Hawkins says as he lifts your eyelid and shone a light in your eyes

"Okay. I'm going back home for the week so I'll have you or Bucky contact me if anything happens."

"Yeah, of course, we'll contact you if anything happens." Dr. Hawkins says before he leaves your room.

Clint turns to Bucky, "Thanks again for all that you're doing to help her."

"No problem. Don't worry you'll be the first person to know if anything happens to her."

Clint nods and gets up. He gently caresses your cheek with his thumb and places a kiss on your forehead. "I love you Y/N. We all do. I'll be back to see you soon but please come back to us." He whispers and gets up, he gives a reassuring squeeze to Bucky's shoulder and says his goodbyes to Bucky, and leaves your room.

Bucky spends the next few days with you, not sleeping at all because he's more worried about you and worried about his nightmares coming back. The times that he does fall asleep, his recurring nightmares of him getting ripped away from you and getting turned back into the Winter Soldier come back to haunt him. The team comes to visit you and Bucky every day until one day when Thor, Steve, Sam, and Peter are in the hospital to visit you Bucky pulls Steve outside of your room.

"Hey, are you doing okay?" Steve asks, worried about his best friend.

"Umm, yeah I'm fine." Bucky sighs, rubbing the back of his neck, nervously.

"Bucky I know you. What's really going on?"

Bucky looks over at you through the glass window and back at Steve, "Well, I'm worried that I won't be able to protect Y/N in the way that I had hoped."

"The way that you hoped? What do you mean by that?"

"Ever since I became the Winter Soldier, I worry about myself turning back into what I was and what if I can't protect her in the way that I promised Clint?"

"Well, Bucky, you guys seem to like each other a lot and I understand, but you're not the same person you were."

"I get that, but I'm terrified to go back to what I once was, I'm terrified to go back to that murderer that killed people without any choice, and I'm afraid to kill Y/N, I don't want to hurt her in any way, cause I do love her."

"I understand that Bucky. But what's this all about?"

"I just keep having this recurring nightmare of me getting ripped away from Y/N by Hydra and them controlling me again to kill her." Bucky looks back at you nervously and back at Steve.

There was a moment of silence before Bucky spoke up, "Steve, you've got to promise me one thing."

"What's that?"

"You've to promise me that if anything were to happen to me, that you'll protect her no matter the cost."

"Buck, nothing will happ--"

Bucky cuts Steve off, "Promise me."

Steve sighs, knowing that Bucky is going through something as hard as seeing his girlfriend in a coma and having these nightmares is heartbreaking but he knows that he has to keep his promise to his best friend, "I promise."

Bucky and Steve go back into your room and spend the rest of the day with each other. Bucky knows that his best friend can keep his promise because he's known his best friend for forever and he's the only one that he can trust with you and tell him about his nightmares, he's told Sam about his nightmares but only briefly but he's also told you about a lot of his nightmares but you've also told him a lot about your nightmares and although the both of you aren't really ones to open up about what's going on, you've both learned that when you have each other that you've both learned to confide in each other and it was definitely hard considering your guys past together.