❖His Gem♦💎♦Ashtray❖

They Don't Know

       I smiled to myself, Ash and I watching a movie in the livingroom of his house. Each of us on separate couches, Fezco upstairs in his room. The movie, 'Big Daddy' playing because we've literally watched almost every movie in the house by now.

     It was after Christmas, but before all the current bullshit went down. We were in a nice place.

"You should come over for dinner one day and meet my dad." I say randomly. Almost surprising myself at the random gesture but mentally praising the idea non-the-less. I think back to one of the last times I went out to dinner with my father and Jules, our father teasing both Jules and I for our crushes. Wanting to meet them, well ready meeting Rue but, wanting to do stuff with her involved. Back then the thought of him and Ash meeting terrified me but.. I don't know.. I kinda liked the idea now.

"I'm like.. 1,000 percent sure, your father would not be okay with that." He chuckled out. I hummed out musingly.

"He might be a little surprised at first but, I mean.. I'm sure he'll like you." I try, raising my head to look over at him more. Him on the other couch opposite of me, giving me a rather unconvinced look.

"I can't picture anyone's father liking me hanging out with their daughter, ma. Sorry, not happening." I couldn't help but hum out a giggle, shaking my head at him some before turning back to the t.v.

"Yeah, but like..  He usually sees the good in all people." He almost scoffs at this, almost laughing out with it. I almost side glance, glad he was finding this so amusing.

"He can't find, what's not there, ma." He lets out an airy exhale, folding his arms behind his head. I turned to him as he tried to get more comfortable on the couch, looking over as he noticed me looking.

"I found it didn't I?" I grinned, almost beaming over at him. I turn back to the t.v. feeling his eyes linger on me for an extra second before turning to the t.v.

"..That's 'cause I let you see it."

      My father let her back, because that's who he is. He saw my mother felt bad and wanted to help her make amends with us, which I still didn't see, nor believed..

I believed in my father, not her. And my mother was never one to shy away from exploiting his goodness.

"I was- I was in such a good mood that day too.. You know what the worst part was?" I asked openly, not waiting for a reaction or answer, glaring at the ceiling now. Silently fuming, as I thought back to that day. 

"He went to see the bitch on Christmas. He planned it. While I was making the cookies, he came in the kitchen. He could have said something then, but did he? Nooo. He just..he-" I gritted my teeth as I felt the corner of my eyes sting. I swallowed the lump in the back of my throat. Balling my hands and gesturing them in violence as I recalled the memory, my hands moving about in anger.

"He just let her in and expected us to forgive her. " I raised a lip, my knee raised up slightly, rocking side to side anxiously. My arms then gesturing to the side, as if demonstrating how he just let her back in our life.. Tried too anyways.

    I let my arms fall back down as I chuckled sarcastically but couldn't help but feel slightly better as I mentally cheered myself up.

"But while dad was upstairs.. trying to get Jules to get out of her room and talk to mom, I did." I grinned happily, sighing contently as I felt breathless laughs escape, my mind all over the place. My mind seeming to have no filter, my body moving and swaying to the drugs that coursed through my system still.