Into the Wild

Chapter 10

Lauren

I spent the rest of the day thinking over my interaction with Noah that morning. He seemed as confused as I was on what had happened. But that's not really the part I was thinking about. Him grabbing my hand and holding it was the main thing running through my mind. His hand was so warm and solid against mine. And he looked so cozy I wanted to snuggle up with him. His hoodie looked so soft and those sweatpants did too. They also did nothing to hide the fact that he wasn't wearing any boxers. 

But I'm trying to push that thought from my brain, even though the image seems to be on replay. 

Respectfully, of course. 

I'm so distracted I give up trying to keep the fifth graders I'm subbing for today in line and decide to pop in a movie. It's not even educational. That's how done with them I am. 

I think I'm even more excited than they are when the final bell rings and I throw my purse over my shoulder, only stopping long enough to make sure the last kid makes it out of the room before I lock the door. I wave good bye to a few other teachers on my way out. They're all so friendly and have accepted me so quickly. It's like everything fell into place when I got here, just as it should be. 

I decide to hit the grocery store before I head home. Only cooking for one has been a relief, especially because I don't have to worry about anyone throwing the food at me if it's not cooked to ridiculous perfection. But that means I don't keep as much food on hand and have to shop more often. Since the little grocery store in town keeps so much fresh, local food on hand I don't mind at all. 

I wander up and down the aisles, sort of hoping I run into Noah. I stop to check the aisle I saw him in last time, smiling to myself as I remember the adorable blush on his cheeks. He was so preciously flustered. So unlike how he normally is, cold, distant, stoic. I'd love to see him smile. Just once. 

I finish up and pay, loading my groceries into the car. As I go to close my trunk, I get that prickling sensation that someone's watching me again. It makes my stomach begin to churn, nausea threatening as I try to hurry. My pulse quickens as dread spirals through me and I do my best to stay focused. I look around, but don't see anything out of the ordinary. Just people shopping, waving to each other as they go in and out. I practically run to put my cart away and keep my eyes open as I walk back to my car, my keys ready to start it. I lock the doors as soon as I slide in, taking deep breaths as I make my way to the street. I drive around for a little while, making sure no one's following me.

When I'm convinced I'm alone, I drive back to my cabin. When I see the small structure appear, I start to relax, my breathing back under control as I park. I rest my forehead against the steering wheel, willing myself to calm down.

'I'm safe. I got away. He'll never find me. I'm safe. I got away. He'll never find me.'

I repeat this to myself over and over until I believe it. Some days are worse than others, but every day here is better than even the best day I spent with him.

I climb out of the car, my hands and legs no longer shaking, and grab a couple of bags from the trunk. I drop them off in the kitchen, shivering in the chilly evening air. The sun is almost ready to set and I know it'll be hard to warm up when it does, so I head over to the fire place and throw a couple of logs in. I'm nearly out and I know I'll need to ask Noah for more soon. I'm not sure if the idea of calling him thrills me or terrifies me.

I watch the fire grow, the embers glowing as they lick up the logs. It begins to crackle and warmth permeates the small room. I hear a clicking sound behind me. I think at first it's the spitting of the fire, but it's slow and methodical. I turn towards the door, ready to bring in the rest of my bags when I stop, my whole body going still at what I see.