thinking about you [muke af]

twenty eight

twenty eight

Michael was still holding Luke one week later. "Please, don't go," he sobbed.

Luke tried to let out a laugh through his own tears. He held Michael tighter, his small biceps most likely choking Michael. "I'm so sorry."

Mike wiped his tears on Luke's shirt, clutching his hands onto the fabric covering his back. "I can't live without you."

Luke let go of him, moving his hands up to Mike's face. "You can do this," his voice was cracking and his eyes were red. "I'm gonna see you soon, we're gonna get through this and come out even stronger."

Michael continued to cry. He tried to hold it together, trying to put on a smile. "What if we don't?" His face fell again.

"We will." 

Michael looked down at his feet. 

"Come on, talk to me."

"That was the first thing you said to me," Michael said. He remember the moment almost six months ago, Luke on his knees in front of Mike's bed, trying to get him to stop crying. Look at them now. "God, I cry so much."

The two let out a laugh, trying to make it seem like they weren't about to die. 

Luke wiped a hand through Michael's hair, brushing the strands out of his face. "I love you, so much."

Calum and Ashton were only feet away, looking at them with scrunched eyebrows. 

"Promise me we'll never get like that," Calum said, tangling their hands together. 

Ash laughed, "I don't ever want you to see my cry like that."

Cal leant his head on top of his boyfriends. "Luke is gonna miss his flight at the rate."

"I think that's what Michael is hoping."

Michael kissed his chapped lips once more before finally letting go. The moments were a blur. He watched Luke's beat up Vans walk across the airport floor and into security. He watched his broad shoulders make his way into line, his blonde head would turn out, giving Michael a nervous smile every few minutes. 

He rounded the last corner, turning once more to blow a kiss to his three friends. 

Michael collapsed his body into Calum's arms, holding him closely. He knew he fell too fast for that blonde boy. He was so in love, too in love to even remember himself. It's been six months and he already convinced himself that Luke is his happy ever after. 

But, maybe love doesn't have a time on it. Some people fall in love within ten years, five years, ten minutes, five minutes. It could be days, weeks, years. It doesn't matter. Love is love is love is love. Michael is in love. 

Michael's sad eyes watched Cal and Ashton hold hands over the console in the car. He watched Calum's thumb rub over Ashton's knuckles, their fingers entwined so tightly. The soft hum of the radio was the only sound in the small car. 

Michael didn't eat that night, he just went to bed, curled up in the sheets. It was the first time in a long time that he was all alone. He was alone in his bed and he didn't like it. He didn't like not having his body curled around Luke. He didn't like feeling so empty. 

He tossed and turned, the sheets flying around. 

Mike gave up on sleep, he sat up in his bed, his feet on the cold ground. The thin walls reminded him that he was all alone. Calum was at Ashton's once again. The nights when he needed a friend, he had no one. 

He grabbed a journal and pen, flipping through the pages. "I can't remember the last time I heard your voice/ I'm sat in silence living in a world of noise," words flew from the tip of his pen, leaking onto the page. He couldn't see if he was within the lines, the room was pitch black. "'Cause you were perfection/ 'Cause I've been from place to place/ Trying to bring you back/I've walked for days and days/ 'Cause I can't face the fact," he came out of his daze when water fell on the page. 

He felt his eyes, he was crying. He was crying again because he's the biggest baby in the entire world. "That nothing is better than you."

He looked at the two verses. The two verses made him realize how alone he can possibly get. His mind is a hazy warfare and Luke was holding back the battle.

(a/n) im sad